


Synthetic Sensations

by RedHoneyBun



Category: Call of Duty
Genre: Guess who finally shows up, Homophobic Language, Humans AU, Maybe - Freeform, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, eventually, some mention of suicide, tank is a lonely boi, ya know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-23
Updated: 2018-04-10
Packaged: 2018-12-05 15:52:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 19
Words: 29,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11581269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedHoneyBun/pseuds/RedHoneyBun
Summary: After the death of his husband Tank finds himself with an Edward shaped hole in his heart. After spending months alone in his house it comes to him that the only person that can replace Edward is Edward himself.





	1. Futuristic FedEx

Tank watched through the window as the delivery man walked towards the door. He had hoped the box would’ve been more discrete but at that moment he didn't really care too much. What mattered to him was what was inside the (too large) box. He watched as the delivery man came up the steps wheeling the delicate package behind him and hoped it hadn't gotten damaged during the trip. He watched as the man knocked on the door and quickly opened it startling the poor man. The man stepped back in surprise as tank popped out the doorway and quickly calmed down. Tank would've been embarrassed had he not already been excited and waiting for this for months.  
“I have a package for… Thomas” he said checking the clipboard he had been holding under his arm.  
“That’s me.” Tank smiled as he signed for his package and brought the box inside.  
“Enjoy.” The man walked away and got back into his van. Tank carefully closed the door and fastened the locks after checking to make sure none of the neighbors had seen the awkward transaction. He drew the curtains closed keeping the outside world from coming into his, rather messy, living room. He sliced through the tape and ripped apart any packaging in his way. Once everything was out he was left with a stack of papers and a sleek metallic box. He opened the black box slowly as if he were afraid, or even able, to break it. He stepped back and took in the sight of the humanoid robot among the tangle of complex looking wires.

It took him a while to turn it on. He had expected it to be a much harder process other than a tap here and there. As soon as his hand touched the final spot, he felt life come into the machine. It slowly opened its eyes before carefully unplugging the wires itself and sitting up in the coffin like box. It smiled at him before stepping out of the box to properly greet him. “Hello sir. It’s nice to meet you.” He smiled again and Tank clenched his jaw in an attempt to keep himself from crying. His eyes scanned the machines body and face, taking in as much of the details as he could before his vision began to get blurry.  
“Oh my God… Eddie… it’s really you.” He hugged the synth as tight as he could. He felt its familiar arms around him and it was even harder not to cry. Eddie stayed in the position until Tank let the moment sink in and composed himself.

As soon as the hug ended the bot got to work cleaning up the mess of packaging that consumed the floor before heading into the kitchen to clean that up too, leaving the coffin he had arrived in discarded on the floor to be properly dealt with later once dinner was taken care of.  
“So… what exactly can I make you do?”  
"Anything as long as it follows the manuals guidelines."  
"Which are...?"  
"You need to read the manual. Sorry sir."  
"Hey Eddie can you stop calling me 'sir'"  
"Sorry, is Thomas better?"  
"Tank."  
"Alright, Tank it is then." The synth smiled and for the second time that day tank found it nearly impossible to keep himself from crying. The smile faded and was replaced by a look of concern. He felt the familiar arms wrap around him. "It's ok tank." Eddie stroked his hair, "I know it's a lot to take in but, don't worry the scratchy fabric of its hospital like clothing rubbing against tanks face giving him something to focus on other than his own emotions.  
"Do you... Do you want to change your clothes?"  
"That would be nice, yes" Tank held its hand as he led it upstairs to the room that they used to share in a past life  
"You know where your stuff is right?" Eddie nodded and looked around until it put together something it liked. "I'll let you get dressed." Tank stepped out the room and went back to reading the manuals on the table. Something about the combination of fine print and long sentences made everything five times more confusing than it truly was or even needed to be. He wished he could just have the robot read it to him but it felt wrong having it read its own instructions.

Edward came back to the kitchen, now much more comfortably dressed. "Is there anything you need me to do?"  
"Not really... Do you want to watch TV and cuddle? Your favorite show just started a new season... We could watch that."  
"Alright," it smiled, "if that's what you want."

If tank closed his eyes it was almost like everything was how it used to be. He and Eddie curled up on the couch with the televisions glow illuminating them as they provided their own commentary on the show barely paying attention to the action on screen; focusing, instead, on making each other laugh. But when he opened his eyes it was harder to pretend. The synth stared at the screen blankly as if only to give off the appearance of paying attention without the enjoyment. There was no usual hugs or kisses during the commercial breaks; just more blank staring and occasional forced smiles.  
"It's getting late," the bot spoke up breaking the silent tension, "we should go to bed."  
"Yea... Do you need me to put you in a charging station or something?"  
"No tank," it giggled, "I can charge wirelessly...that is if you want to share a bed."  
"C'mon...let's go upstairs."

Tank looked away from the synth as it stripped down to a pair of boxer shorts before climbing into bed. It smiled at tank before cuddling with him. "Goodnight tank." It said before closing its eyes in mock sleep. Tank kissed the robots hair and tried his hardest to pretend. He gave it a kiss on the cheek. He started to kiss its neck as his hand went under the shorts elastic band. The synth sprung to life and gently, yet firmly, grabbed his wrist. "In order to continue with your current action you must enable the proper the settings. Instructions can be found online or in the manual."


	2. Flashback #1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternative title: Maybe one day I'll write a sex scene but today is not that day.  
> This is a flashback to a moment when Tank and Eddie were married. Flashbacks are probably gonna happen every other chapter as a way to show some of the "real" Eddie.

   They untangled their warm, sweaty bodies from each other. Their hands still rubbing at exposed skin as a way to grasp the final strands of intimacy left after their session of love. Their lips acting as the bridge connecting themselves to one another until that, too, came to an end. Tank looked into his arms to find that warm, dorky, inviting, wonderful smile he'd come to love. "Well someone's happy." He said playfully receiving a small chuckle from his husband intertwined with a small hum of agreement.

"I love you..." Eddie’s smile went away a little too fast as he looked away from Tank’s eyes.

"I love you too Eddie." He said after a sigh. That little shift in his tone; Tank knew what was coming next and he was out of ideas on how to stop it. He couldn't deal with it; not now at least. He let Eddie snuggle deeper into his arms until his lovers head was under his neck.

"I wish we could stay like this forever." Eddie rubbed Tank’s arm gently, trying to memorize every detail. He wanted to remember every little bump and curve as if that would immortalize the moment and, by extension, himself. He drew his hand away in defeat knowing that it was useless seeing that he couldn't take his memories with him when he reached the inevitable conclusion of his illness. Whenever that may be.

"I can't give you forever...but I can give you tonight." Tank replied staring off into the gifted cross that adorned the wall in between the open windows. He had never really been the religious type despite his mother’s complete devotion to their local church but in rough times like these he'd take any help he could get even if it came in the form of a plain little wooden cross given to him as a wedding gift. When that didn't work he turned to the nature Ed insisted on inviting into the room despite the convenience of an air conditioner. He tried to find some sort of answer in the movement of the curtains as the outside wind made its way in. He watched distantly as the thin fabric moved in waves and nearly reached up to touch the bed but dropped back down as the air giving it its energy faded out. The cold air making Eddie seek more warmth in his arms brought him back to the topic at hand. He snapped back to his body leaving the thoughts floating just like the curtains and he wrapped the smaller man in a big hug almost instinctively.

"I made an appointment with the corporation." Eddie broke the silence that Tank didn't realize was there.

"For...?"

"I don't know...I thought you would appreciate having my memories stored somewhere...in case you ever wanted them."

“I appreciate the thought but it’s not necessary. What am I gonna do with a disc full of your memories? Watch it like a medical drama except without the drama and whole lot more paperwork? Even if I did want the complete box set of The Amazing Medical Achievements of Dr. Edward Richtofen I would still have to wait a literal lifetime before they even think of sending them over to me.”

"You don't know that Tank." Eddie smiled softly, slightly appreciating the optimism, putting his hand on Tank’s cheek, "for all we know my heart could just stop tomorrow afternoon. Which is why I want to be prepared for the unexpected." Tank looked into his lover’s mismatched eyes. Eddie never liked them, always saying that they were too distracting when he was talking to a patient. Tank, like everyone else, liked them. It was something unique that made Eddie just that much more special. Tanks mom used to say that the angel who made Eddie didn't know which looked prettier so he settled on blue on the left and green on the right; Tank full-heartedly believed that too.

Eddie turned the TV on to have some noise fill up the room. He gave Tank’s neck small kisses and smiled when Tank chuckled. He rested his head on Tank’s chest and quickly fell asleep. Tank wrapped the blanket around their bodies and enveloped Eddie in his arms in an attempt to warm him up. He stared up at the ceiling and lost himself in thought about eddies appointment. He thought about their uncertain future, and what exactly they could do to make the most of it. He felt Eddie start crying and the tears roll down his face onto his chest. He hated that he was used to this and prayed that things got better soon.

 

When he woke up Eddie was replaced by a note that said he had already gone to the appointment and would be back sometime during the afternoon or maybe later. Tank got up and closed the windows taking a moment to look out into the empty backyard. Eddie had always wanted a kid and Tank guessed he did too…eventually. Maybe a child wouldn’t be such a bad thing. Eddie would finally have that family he wanted and he’d be happy, they would all be happy, and everything would be ok.

He made himself some breakfast and ate it quickly desperate to get out of the empty house. He went out to the gym and came back to take a shower all before lunch. He was in the middle of drying off when his phone went off. He answered it after seeing it was Eddie. “Hey babe. How’s the appointment.”

“Fine. It’s really boring but at least I get a break to go eat which is nice, however, the fact that it’s just hospital food isn’t as nice.”

“See. Now you can feel what you put your patients through.”

“What? Flavorless Jell-O?” Eddie chuckled, “So what are you doing.”

“Just got out of the shower. Trying to get dressed with one hand. Missing you.”

“Aw aren’t you adorable. I should be out soon so maybe we could go out and get something to eat?”

“How bout we order some Chinese food instead. Maybe invite some people over. It’ll be like the old times.”’

“You make it sound like I’m 70 but alright sounds fun. Anyways I’ll be out soon but I gotta go. Bye Tank, love you.”

“I love you too Eddie. See you soon.”

 

It was already night out when Eddie finally got back. He walked in and immediately slumped down on the couch next to Tank. They gave each other a quick kiss as a way to say hello. Eddie sat up in his little corner of the couch and messed around with the remote to find his favorite show among the never ending list of recordings neither of them watched but felt bad about deleting just yet. “So how was the…thing?”

“It was invasive, boring, not good. At least it’s over now.”

“Well you came home so early I thought that maybe you were planning on staying the night.” Tank said sarcastically.

“I-I need to tell you something.” Eddie’s voice got a little serious, “I think I might have done something bad… I think.” Tank sat up and Eddie avoided making eye contact suddenly finding his shirt sleeves very interesting.

“What’s wrong Eddie? What did you do?” Tank was nervous and he wasn’t sure how to react.

“I stopped by your brother’s shop… and Dave and I were talking…” Eddie was getting increasingly nervous and red as he tried to look at everything that wasn’t Tank and still finding it very hard.

“Eddie what did you do?” Tank didn’t like the hard edge that went into his voice. He really didn’t want to jump to conclusions.

“It would be a lot easier if I just showed you.” Eddie got up and stood between Tank’s knees before taking off his shirt. Tank watched him still confused but not as worried as he was a few seconds ago. When Eddie finished undressing himself from the waist up Tank immediately focused on the new heart shaped spot that adorned Eddie’s hip.

“You got a tattoo? That’s the bad thing that you did?” Tank almost laughed out of relief. “I thought you fucking murdered somebody, geez Ed.” He reached out to touch the heart and the cold skin surrounding it. “It looks cute. I like it.” He laid a kiss on the tattoo making Eddie blush. "Why don’t we go upstairs so you can give me a closer look?” Eddie gave a slight nod and Tank took that as the go ahead to carry him up the stairs bridal style.

He closed the door behind him and it seemed like the neighbors would have to deal with their open windows for one more night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to say that I love Dave. He is my favorite OC and I have an entire backstory for him and Tank's family. He started off as a joke since he's just Tank's twin brother (but with tattoos) but now he's my precious little baby.


	3. Dr. Monty would make a shitty therapist

When Tank woke up the first thing he did was close his eyes again. There were a few brief seconds when he woke up in the morning where everything was ok. In the few brief seconds after he woke up Eddie was still alive. He was there either still asleep or already on his way to work but he was alive and in the world and just that was enough. In the next seconds that followed Tank's delusion he was made aware of the ever present hum of the air conditioning unit set on high in the middle of summer. In the next few seconds he was made aware of how cold it was, how the unnatural coolness made his skin bump up even from underneath the covers, and more importantly he was made aware of how wrong it all was. The AC drove Eddie insane. He couldn't stand the constant hum that filled and over powered his much loved silence. Eddie couldn't stand it when it was too cold so he preferred the nighttime breeze that disappeared when morning came only to be replaced by a warmth that embraced him throughout the morning before heading off to work. The warmth was his own temporary slice of heaven which the AC threatened to take away at any given chance.

 Tank couldn't stand the outside world. He would look out a window and see kids playing in their front yards, people walking their dogs and laughing, but worst of all he would see the occasional couple holding hands and walking slowly along the sidewalk just enjoying their company. He was angry at the outside. How could they just go on with their day? Couldn't they see that there was something wrong? How the hell could they keep on living when the love of his life was dead and buried in a glorified box in the ground? The only conclusion he could reach was that they just did not care. They just did not care that the only person that ever meant anything to him was gone and there was nothing he could do about it.

 

Tank opened his eyes and reluctantly got out of bed. He turned the air conditioner off and went downstairs. He took his time going down the stairs as he stopped at each step to ask himself if this was really what he wanted to do, and to ask himself if it was even worth getting out of bed in the first place. In the end he decided that the noise of pans being moved around was at least mildly concerning and something he should probably check out. He shuffled to the kitchen and stood at the doorway. The synth was busy checking the expiration dates on the food in the fridge before either putting them back, throwing it away, or using towards the meal he was cooking on the stove. As he threw away a plastic container full of some type of cream that was at least a year old he noticed Tank looking at him.

"Good morning." It smiled that too perfect smile as it closed the fridge door. "Did you sleep well?" Tank gave a vague nod.

"What are you doing?"

"Well it came to my attention while I was trying to make you an omelet that a lot of what was in the fridge was severely out dated. I went ahead and threw it out before it could cause a health hazard from accidental ingestion. I hope you don't mind. I was planning on going to the store later to get some proper ingredients."

"No." The synth seemed confused at Tank's response.

"Excuse me?"

"I don't want you going to the store. In fact I don't want you leaving the house. Eddie...I can't have anyone know that you're here."

"Understood." It nodded to affirm its new request. "Then should I place an order for delivery from the store?"

"That would be better." Tank sat at the table and watched as the synth tried to cook something with the limited choice of ingredients. Tank was surprised the stove even worked anymore. He hadn't turned it on in months. Since Eddie passed away, he'd been living off of Chinese takeout and meals other people had made him out of pity. Neither tasted any good but there was rarely ever anything that did. At least it kept him alive he supposed.

"Breakfast should be done soon if you would like to go to another room to take your call." Before Tank even had time to think of a question to ask his phone started ringing. To his surprise it was under the sofa and it still had some battery left. He looked at the number and sighed before answering.

"Hello?"

"Hello, I'm calling from Dr. Monty's office. It seems like you've missed your previously scheduled appointment...and the 2 before that as well. He would like to see you as soon as possible...preferably today." The soft voice of the synth Secretary spoke.

"...fine I'll go."

"Would you like me to make an appointment?"

"Yes." He said rather harshly, "please." He added after he regretted his earlier tone.

"Alright. Your scheduled time is in 30 minutes." Tank hung up and went back to the table where breakfast was already served. There was a simple bacon and eggs (or rather egg) with some orange juice ready for him.

"You can go ahead and eat. I'll pick out some clothes for you to wear for your appointment." Eddie spoke up and went upstairs.

 

Tank parked in front of the doctor’s house. He found it hard to believe that any good doctor would take patients at his home with his maid as a Secretary but Eddie, the real one, had promised him that he was good and Tank could never say no to him. He knocked on the door and was greeted by the soft spoken synth from the phone before being led into the office.

"You're late." The doctor spoke not even looking up from his desk.

"I _live_ 30 minutes away. What did you expect?"

"Just take a seat." Tank did as he was told and sat down on one of the couches that circled a table as the doctor took a seat in front of him.

"It's been a while since we've talked. Glad to see you're still alive."

"Thanks. It's kind of hard to kill yourself when you took away my gun."

"It was for the best, we don't want another repeat of what happened last time. Besides, you don't even need it." Tank rolled his eyes. He never really liked Monty in the first place but it kept other people from coming in and trying to help him get better even though it was obvious things would never get better. Not without Eddie. "You know. If you really wanted to kill yourself there's nothing stopping you from going out and buying some rope. But that would mean you would have to leave the house wouldn’t it?" Tank was regretting coming here already but it was too late to back out now. "When was the last time you left your house?"

"Aside from today... When was our last appointment?" Monty shook his head.

"You're still angry at the world. You know that angrily staring at some kids playing catch isn't going to bring Eddie back to life. You need to move on."

 

The talking never seemed to end. Every time he came it was the same thing. "There's other people in the world," "your friends are worried about you," or "Eddie wouldn't want to see you like this." They all sounded like static to him. Then again he wasn't really paying attention. The only thing these sessions accomplished was helping Tank remember how alarmingly good he was at tuning people out. It was a skill he hadn't really used since college. He would zone out when his parents would argue during long road trips, or during the entirety of high school, or when some frat boys would make comments in the halls. At this point it was second nature to him. If he cleared his mind the only thing he heard was static. Static was nice, it was something he could focus on and something that would fill his mind. Static was the sound of the car radio as it lost signal when his dad made a wrong turn into a new city which droned out the 5th argument his parents had gotten into since they left the house a few hours ago. It was the sound that replaced the countless parent teacher conferences regarding his barely passing grades which insured his skills at sports where his only ticket into a good college. If he focused hard enough he could replace all the voices that insisted giving him their opinions on his sexuality with nice, clean, static.

"Are you even paying attention?" Monty's stern voice cut through his thoughts.

"Huh?"

"As I was saying," Monty repeated himself, "people are worried about you. I think it's best if you go visit Schuster. Remember you promised Eddie you would try to keep on living. If I remember correctly, which I do, you were much more... healthier last time you came over. How often have you been eating?"

"I... I don't know...I don't pay attention when I eat or not."

 

The session only lasted around 2 hours but it felt like a week before he left that office. He was led out the door with instructions to go to the doctors which happened to be one of Eddie's friends and coworkers not so coincidentally. He called ahead and was able to just show up thanks to connections. He circled the hospital a while trying to find a parking lot and finally found one way in the back squeezed between two big pickup trucks. Careful not to scratch one with his car door, he got out and navigated his way to the clinic with ease. Truthfully all he wanted was to go back home and back into his bed. Maybe hold the synth he paid good money for and pretend things were a lot better than they really were. However, he figured that if he could prove that he was fine to a couple of people that would be enough to make the rest leave him alone at least until the end of the month. He sat in a waiting room for a couple of minutes before he got some messages on his phone from his synth.

**Hello. Just wanted to let you know that the groceries arrived and I will be starting dinner soon.**

**That is if you are going to come home soon. Should I start dinner?**

Tank sighed and told the robot he'd be home soon just so he didn't have to see the name "Ed" show up on his phone anymore. The nurse came out and called his name and he was led to the doctor’s room. He sat on the bed as he waited for Schuster to come in.

"Hello Thomas. Holding up well?" the doctor sat in a chair across from him and looked between Tank and a clipboard.

"I guess..."

"Well all things considered you look well. When Marie passed away I was in a much worse condition." Eddie had explained the story to him a while ago. When Eddie was still in school and was training at the hospital Schuster had just gotten over the death of his wife. He was kept to fill out paperwork and an occasional patient. Eventually he got an early version of a custom synth that looked just like Marie. Of course the early versions of the customs were just made to look pretty and had trouble doing complex tasks which means that even if the source was a master baker the robot would still have trouble making a cake. But the true problem with these early customs was made brilliantly clear when people attempted to have conversations with them. They would be stuck speaking only one language and, unlike other synths, there was no way of adding new languages without unofficial modifications that could end up doing more harm than good depending on the goals of the people that distributed them.

Thankfully for Schuster he was very skilled in this type of robotics. With a lot of his time combined with software updates Marie was practically indistinguishable from a real person, with a couple of exceptions when it came to what she was capable of.

The newer versions of these customs, like the one Tank modeled after Eddie, were just regular housework synths with a certain appearance and voice. While they were able to do more things than their previous versions they still lack a lot in the way of personality. While they do adjust to their housemates it can take up to years for that to happen. Tank wanted his Eddie now which was the true reason he had come here and not home. "There's something I need to ask you." Tank spoke up looking at the dots in the floor tiles.

"Yes?"

"So..." Tank paused looking for the right words, "you have Marie right? Well I... I...have Eddie now."

"Oh." Schuster didn't know how to respond. He wasn't truly surprised since Tank started showing a lot of interest in his life with Marie after Edward passed away.

"I was hoping that you could... I don't know... speed things up? Like make him act more like... Eddie."

"I suppose that I can," he spoke up after a moment of silence, "but it would take a couple of days. Maybe even weeks or months."

"Please." Tank said softly, "I really need you to do this for me." Tank was just pleading at this point.

"Fine but I can't guarantee that it will work or that it'll be fast."

 

Schuster came by the house later that night. Tank let him in and he was greeted by Eddie sitting on the couch smiling at him.

"Hello Schuster." He stood up to properly greet him but his out stretched hand went ignored as Schuster looked him over admiring the attention to detail.

"Wow." Tank had to resist the urge to stop him reminding himself that it was just a robot. Schuster must have caught on to Tank's mood as he stopped and apologized. "Sorry. Are you ready to go?"

"Go where?" Eddie looked over to Tank.

"Ed, you're gonna go with him for a bit. You'll be back soon alright?" Tank said as a way to reassure himself rather than the synth. The synth agreed obviously out of programming rather than option. Tank watched as Eddie got into the car and went off down the street and around the corner. He closed the door and was left in a, once again, empty house. He sighed and turned to go upstairs and into bed.


	4. Flashback #2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The best song for this chapter is sea of love by cat power because just like this chapter it is 100% happy times.

The death of Edward Richtofen was an accident. An accident that could have been avoided had Tank just been there... or at least that's what he tells himself.

 

Since he'd been diagnosed Eddie had just been getting worse and worse and it seemed that no matter what new medicine they tried it didn't work. All it ever did was give false hope like a step ladder to the life he once had only to yank it out from beneath him when he suddenly couldn't breathe. The day he'd found out a virus passed on from the father he didn't know was going to devour him from the inside out wasn't out of the ordinary. From the outside it was a perfect cloudy day with a slight breeze. Tank passed by parks filled with families smiling, and laughing, and being happy as he sped down the street on his way to the hospital only to find his newlywed husband in a coma after a heart attack. The first opinion was stress. Eddie was a busy doctor and it just caught up to him and, after some time off, he should be better but after 2 weeks they woke him up to tell him that he might die at any moment.

 

A month after the incident Eddie had put it behind him and refused to talk about it. To him it was just the last attempt to screw up his life from some parents that didn't love him in the first place. He refused to let them win and the only way to do that was to pretend it didn't exist. Instead, he set his mind on something much better. "Hey _babe_ how do you feel about having a baby?" the question came out of nowhere but it wasn't surprising. Since they got married Eddie had not stopped talking about starting a family.

"' _Babe_ '? Alright... I don't think that's possible last time I checked women were the ones that had babies and well I'm a guy so... don't think that'll work." Tank tried to be funny and Eddie chuckled only to move the conversation forward.

"I got a call from a friend of mine- you know her, Julia, you met her when we to visit my mom- well, anyways, she's pregnant and well..." Eddie slowed down to catch his breath and to make sure Tank was following along, "She can't keep it and she wants us to have it." Tank turned to fully look at him.

"You really want a baby don't you?" Eddie nodded enthusiastically.

"More than anything. Please Tank, Think about it. Please." He begged.

 

In a couple of days everything was set. All they had to do was wait until the baby was born. Unfortunately, Eddie wouldn't have been able to see that day. Not even a week after they had filled out all the necessary paperwork did Eddie start getting sick. It started off slow with him being out of breath quicker than usual and then came the coughing and the bleeding and, finally, another heart attack. Tank didn't know if he would've felt better had it all happened quickly instead of being drawn out the way it was. He couldn't stand to see Eddie cry himself to sleep softly whispering he didn't want to die and how it wasn't fair.

 

The day it actually happened wasn't unexpected as much as Tank wanted to deny it. Eddie had woken him up in the middle of the night scratching at his own throat, desperate for any amount of air to end the misery. By the time they reached the hospital Eddie was able to get a couple of shaky breaths in before collapsing in the ER waiting room. He was carried away by a flock of nurses while Tank was left behind in a crowd of staring eyes and curious minds.

 

What felt like years later a doctor finally came out to lead him to Eddie. The room was quiet with only the steady beeps of the machines hooked up to him. Tank held his hand and couldn't think of anything else. He focused only on Eddie's hand and tried his hardest to remember it. He wanted to remember how warm it was, how it weighed, how soft it was, and how it just felt right to hold. He did his best to memorize how perfect it was to be able to hold Eddie while doing his best to forget it may be the last time he has the opportunity to do so. He stayed like that for a week, only ever being interrupted by nurses who came in to check this or that. After the fifth day he was there a male nurse in ill-fitting gray scrubs came in. He looked like he hadn't slept in months and had to borrow someone else's clothes for the day but they were too big to fit him properly. Tank didn't think too much about it since he was too busy focusing on Eddie and realizing that he himself probably didn't look to good either.

"You've been in here for a while," he scratched the back of his head and looked behind him before entering the room quickly, "why don't you go get something to eat at the cafeteria. You starving yourself isn't going to help him."

"Alright." Tank nodded in agreement slowly standing up from his chair. His legs had fallen asleep and he almost tripped over himself just by standing. "I-I'll be right back Eddie." He patted Eddie’s leg before walking out. The nurse stepped aside to let him out of the room and Tank kept walking down the hallway.

 

He didn't even make it halfway to the cafeteria before he heard alarms going off and saw nurses and doctors charging towards him and into Eddie's room. He ran back towards the room only to be held back from entering. He only stopped struggling as he saw security dragging out the nurse in gray. "That fucker deserved it! He murdered my wife and got away with it!" Tank stood there not sure what to do. His anger was telling him to run and throw him out a window but the realization that it was his fault that whatever happened to Eddie happened froze him in place. The security synths pulled him out of the building with ease leaving Tank with nothing to do other than drown in his guilt.

 

He was told later on that the man’s wife had been one of Eddie’s patients. She had to go through a risky surgery with a low chance of survival and she hadn’t survived. Tank remembered once that Eddie came home and couldn’t sleep for weeks out of guilt. She had been the first, and the only, patient that Eddie could not save.

 

Whatever happened next was a blur. He remembered being told officially that Eddie had been disconnected from everything and had suffocated leading to his death. He remembered crying and having to call his brother Dave. He remembered just sitting there feeling numb as Dave took over and called all anyone who cared and told them what happened. He remembered thinking that the 5 minutes between them had made a difference as he watched him handle everything so naturally. He remembered being driven home and sitting down on his couch and suddenly feeling that everything was too big and too much all at once.

 

He remembered feeling all alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have 4 different versions of this chapter just because I couldn't figure out how I wanted this chapter to go. Sorry That I missed a week but I hope that you enjoy this chapter.


	5. Evil neighbor lady, Dave, and a phone call

 "It’s such a tragic thing that happened. He deserved much better. I'm sure Jake would've loved to come over but you know how busy he is with work." The woman, Justine as she was called, said with the most condescending tone she could muster. "I would've come sooner but..."she paused and looked down into her arms, "it was too much stress for the baby." Even the child in her arms reeled back from her too loud and unnecessary sing-song voice. "Besides, I wouldn't have been much help with all the hormones." Tank risked a glance down at the newborn boy. At the moment he was busy drinking his mother’s milk from underneath an intentionally ill-placed cover. Tank flicked his eyes back up just in time to see her smirk quickly disappear before she continued talking about how Eddie's death was such a horrible thing to happen and how it personally affected her and especially how lonely he must be.

 

Tank knew why she was really here. She didn’t care about Eddie; she didn’t really care about him either. All she wanted to do was show off her child and see if Tank had changed his mind now that his prior commitment was gone. This display of her new motherly status sickened Tank. How could anyone use an innocent child as a way to be so unfaithful? Yet, with that small, split second smirk it was decided who had the power here. That seemingly insignificant movement of her lips said it all. “ _See? Do you see how much better I am than you? You said no to me once before and now I have a family and you have nothing_.” That tiny expression kicked him down while simultaneously offering a hand to lift him up: “ _But I can make you feel better. I can make you feel something. All you have to do is say ‘yes’. No one has to know and even if they do, what do you have to lose?_ ” Tank sat there and forced a smile while he ignored everything she said and focused on the clock behind her. The offer was tempting. There was nothing he liked about her. He could find dozens of others that looked and acted just like her who would be willing to do the same if he played his cards right; she wasn’t unique. However, there was one thing she was offering that, while also not being unique, was harder to find. If he went through with this he could get rid of the constant static that filled his mind. He could finally feel something. Guilt. Shame. Regret. Anything would’ve been better.

 

Tank barely registered that she had moved from her seat and was now on the couch sitting next to him. He felt her warm hand gently rub his thigh and slowly inch its way up. He didn’t stop her. His eyes had caught the framed picture hanging on the wall nearby. Eddie’s mismatched eyes locked with his own; their permanent smile lessened the static. “You know…I’m always here to help.” The voice next to him said softly as if it was a secret.

“I think you should go.”

 Justine stood up and looked at the frame that had captured Tanks attention. She said a half thought out excuse on how she had to go start dinner for her husband before leaving with her baby in her arms. Her husband was away on a business trip. Tank knew that was a lie; just another attempt to remind him of what he loss.

 

With his unwanted guest now gone Tank was left with nothing to do. He walked around the house, ignoring the burning on his thigh from her hand, and tried to organize his thoughts. The feeling of being touched clung to all his thoughts. What he had once taken for granted was now forcing its way to the front of his mind. It wasn’t even a sexual thing. He just missed being touched. He missed hugs, he missed being leaned on, he missed having Eddie on his back when one of their dates went on too late into the night and he’d be too tired to walk back to his dorm so Tank would have to carry him. Tank missed handshakes. Had it really been that long since he left the house? When was the last time he talked to someone just for the purpose of talking? He missed people. He missed Eddie most of all.

As he made his way around the house he noticed the robot had cleaned. He’d actually almost forgot about it. He wondered what it was doing at the moment. Maybe Schuster had gotten off work early and was poking around inside of it messing with this wire or that. Tank didn’t know how robots worked but he hoped it was ok and that whatever was being done to him didn’t hurt him.  It, Tank reminded himself. “Just because it looks like him doesn’t mean it is him. People don’t come back.”

As if on track with his thoughts, his feet stopped moving and planted themselves in front of a door. The door. The door Tank had been avoiding yet, at the same time, couldn’t stop coming back to. Behind it was Eddie’s office under lock and key. The whole house was filled with things that brought back painful memories but nothing hit worse than the door. Eddie only used the office to fill out important papers but that didn’t stop him from decorating it with various pictures and filling his bookshelves with photo albums of the two. When Tank thought about it, he could remember some things like Eddie’s first family picture hanging on the wall in front of him surrounded by countless awards, or their wedding picture in a large frame hanging behind the desk. Other things were harder to remember. For example: he could not remember what picture he had in the frame on his desk. Pictures were very important to Eddie, especially near the end. Maybe that’s why he installed the lock. So he could cry surrounded by happy memories and take as many as he could with him. Tank wished he knew where Eddie put the key.

As he debated whether or not to just simply break down the door there was a noise coming from up front. Someone had come inside. “Hey Tank!” It was Dave. Tank went to meet him in the kitchen just in time to see him set down a pan covered in tin foil. “I figured you hadn’t eaten anything home cooked in while so I made you something.” Tank hadn’t realized how hungry he was until he smelled the food from underneath the foil. He grabbed some plates and helped himself to some of the pasta one of Dave’s lovers had cooked. Dave chuckled as he watched Tank take down half of the dish in a second. “I also got your mail for you. Let’s see...bill, bill, junk,” Dave tossed the envelopes to the side as he read off their contents, “and finally…this?” He looked at the enveloped in confusion and Tank looked up to see the familiar white on blue envelope. Tank stared at the logo, a simplified white bird rising up inside a white circle. Dave opened the letter.

 

"'Thank you for your purchase'!" Dave was angry, "Tommy what did you do?" Tank hadn't been called that in years. In fact he hadn't heard Dave call him that since they moved out to go to different colleges. Dave stared into Tanks eyes and Tank stared back at Dave's identical set. The silence between them grew as Tank contemplated how he was going to explain his actions to him. "It says it's a custom model. I'm guessing it looks like... him." Tank nodded. Dave sighed and put his head in his hands. "Jesus Tank, if you were lonely you could've told me. I could've found someone for you." Tank looked away and out the window focusing on the night sky. "This expensive sex doll isn't going to fix anything."

"He's not a sex doll Dave!"

"'he'. Then what is it Tank?"

"It's complicated." Tank felt his eyes begin to water and his voice start to shake even after such little words. Dave noticed and softened up.

"I know this has been hard on you and... I don't think reviving him via robot was the best way to cope with it. I know it sounds good, it's so easy to just have that and pretend that nothing happened, but I'm afraid it's going to cause more harm than good." Tank turned to look at Dave and blinked away the tears. He was getting better and not crying which was something he'd never thought he would have to work at. "Just promise me it won't get in the way of caring for your daughter."

 

As they were talking, night fell around them. It was too dark and too late for Dave to drive home so, instead, he chose to spend the night in one of the guest rooms. As Tank was preparing for bed, his phone began to ring. He checked the name and quickly scrambled for his glasses. "Hello?"

"Hello, Thomas." Eddie's mom spoke softly. "I'm not waking you up am I?" The words came slowly as the translator in the glasses processed the words.

"No, it’s alright. How are you doing?" Tank felt awkward talking to her. The translator glasses, or lingolenses as they were marketed as, could translate things both ways. While Tank was hearing their conversation in English, although with slowed words, she was hearing it in German. They worked but had the side effect of giving him a nasty headache afterwards. Eddie had once explained it was because of the waves it used to work and how it would be much better to just learn the language but Tank could never get a grasp on it no matter how hard Eddie tried.

"I'm doing fine." She responded. The conversation was stiff even without the delay. "I just wanted to ask for a favor."

"Sure. Anything."

"Eddie's birthday is coming up. Can you leave some flowers for me?" The small hitch in her voice stung Tank. Eddie's death had been hard on Tank but it was even worse for her. Eddie was her only child and she hadn't seen him in a while before the incident.

"Of course." Tank felt like he should say something. He just didn't know what.

"You know, he loved you so much." She sniffed and Tank could practically see her tears streaming down.

"Yes I-I know." He tried to stay strong. It wouldn't do any good for both of them to be crying.

"You made him so happy. Thank you." He clenched his teeth to avoid any whimpers from coming out.

Tank felt the headache start creeping up.


	6. Flashback #3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 1

Tank stared up at the wall in front of him. It was behind a desk and it was lined with frames containing either certificates or family pictures. He looked down at the the desk itself which was covered in unorganized paperwork with a couple of kitten figures littered in between. He wasn't surprised he'd ended up in his professors office. Honestly, he was more surprised that he even had a professor to meet in an office. He had never planned on going to college. His plan in life was to do what his father did and join the army as soon as he was out of high school. In a way he did do that. He joined, was sent off to fight in some war, and came back to some scholarships money as a reward. That, coupled with a football scholarship had, miraculously, landed him here where he wasn't even scraping by. He would've dropped out long ago but his mother was so proud of him and he just couldn't let her down. Not again. So he tried his hardest...and still failed...miserably. Although you can't really try hard if you don't even know what you're doing can you?

 

The door to his side opened and the professor walked in. She sat down in the chair in front of him and shifted some papers around so she could put her arms on the desk. As she straightened up the door opened up again and another student stood in the door way. He stood there for a while before she gestured for him to take a seat. He sat next to Tank and avoided Tank’s eyes. “I know we’ve had this talk before Thomas and this is your final warning. If you don’t do something now you will lose your scholarships. This is why Edwards here. I asked and he’s willing to tutor you.” At the mention of his name Edward looked up and gave a small smile before turning over to look at Tank. Tank looked at him. Edward was skinny, shy, nervous, and looked like he was trying to hide in his sweater. His hair was neatly combed and parted to side. “Well, I’ll leave you two to sort out your schedules with each other.” And with that she turned to her paperwork and both of them walked out into the hallway.

 

"Listen. If you're busy I get it. You don't have to do what she said. I don't want to drag you down." Tank offered hoping he'd say yes and just let him fail so he could stop pretending he belonged here. However, Edward did not say yes. He turned around and, while avoiding eye contact with anything but the ground, spoke for the first time.

"I-it's alright." He stuttered as if he was unsure of how his words, "I'd like to help. We can start today...if that's OK with you." Tank picked up on the accent.

"Sure." Tank smiled out of politeness. Edward followed him down to the track without saying a word. "I'm gonna be here for a while. You can wait here... I guess...or you can come back and meet me here." Edward sat his stuff down on a nearby table and Tank nodded before walking away.

 

He joined the rest of the team in running and stretching while the cheerleaders practiced on their side of the field. He waved to his girlfriend and she blew a kiss back. He smiled as his friend John joined him on the grass. “So how was the meeting?”

“It was fine. She made me get a tutor. Honestly, I was kind of hoping he’d leave but I guess not.”

“Is it that guy that’s been staring at you since the beginning of practice?” He jerked his thumb behind him and Tank looked in the direction. Edward was there at the table staring down at him before they locked eyes and he quickly went back to reading his book. Tank chuckled and turned back to John. “I’ve seen him around before. He was crying behind some bushes until his _boyfriend_ came to get him.” He said the word with disgust and finished off the sentence by rolling his eyes. “Fucking nerd.” As Tank was about to say something the coach turned to look at them causing Tank to stop before he even started.

 

The rest of the practice passed by in much the same way. He and the rest of the team went on doing whatever the coach demanded from them, he got a couple of shouts from the cheerleaders, and quite a few stares from Edward. As he was packing up he saw a flutter of pom poms from the corner of his eyes and waved to his girlfriend as he went to meet up with Edward. "Enjoy practice?" Tank asked. Edward fumbled with his textbook that he was hiding behind as he stuttered out some sort of response. He coughed and cleared his throat as a way to regain his composure. Before he got a chance to speak, however, Tank felt an added weight to his back.

"You were amazing out there babe!" His girlfriend shouted as she wrapped her arms around his neck and he vaguely noticed Edward tense up at her presence. "Who's this?" She asked as she just now acknowledged him sitting there.

"Oh this is Edward. He's helping me with some class stuff."

"Oh! I know you! You're the guy who's dating Rodney." She pointed at him as she said it. Edward looked up at them and nodded, obviously only playing along to be nice. "Hey what's wrong with your eyes?" She got off of tanks back and sat next to him practically laying across the table as she leaned in for a closer view. That’s when Tank noticed it too. His eyes were mismatched. They were, without a doubt, the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. He couldn’t stop staring at them even when Edward looked away at anything else except for the two people right in front of him.

"That's just how they are..." he was obviously uncomfortable. "I... It looks like you're busy. We can meet up later." Before Tank could say anything Juliet answered for him.

"You can have him once I’m done with him." She giggled and winked and Edward grew red in the cheeks before looking down at the ground.

"You can call me and tell me where you want to meet up." He passed Tank a piece of paper with his dorm room and phone number before he walked away.

"Ugh," Juliet said in disgust as soon as Edward started walking away, "makes sense he's fucking Rodney. Weird fags stick together I guess." Edward, no doubt, heard everything she said and hugged himself a little tighter and walked a little faster. Tank didn't say anything.

 

It was later in the night when Tank finished his shower after their little private cheer session. He looked at the scrap piece of paper and sighed as the phone rang before Edward picked up. "Hey Ed it's Tank. Are you free right now?"

"Uh...yes. You can come over to my dorm if you'd like."

"Sounds good." Tank made walked across campus to reach his dorm. Edward let him in as soon as he knocked as if he were waiting for him to show up right beside the door. Tank smiled at him and was let inside the dorm which looked more like a small apartment than a dorm. Everything was out in the open except for a door leading into a bathroom and shower. There was a table near a window where Edward had set up all his books. As he walked over to the table he noticed what areas of the room obviously belonged to Edward and which belonged to his roommate. The left bed was neatly made while the other had clothes and papers littered all over it and the surrounding floor. Tank sat down next to Edward and started unpacking books from his backpack.

 

"So what do you want to start with?" Edward asked.

"You're the teacher, whatever sounds best." Edward nodded and began to flip through some papers.

"I want to apologize..." Tank spoke up without thinking.

"What for?" Edwards voice was soft as if this was the first time he'd heard those words and wasn't sure how to respond to them.

"For what Juliet said... about your eyes and... stuff."

"Oh" was all he could bring himself to say.

"They're really pretty by the way." Tank spilled out and immediately regretted it.

"Th-thanks." Eddie's pale skin turned bright red. Something about the way he looked hit a nerve with Tank and he found himself blushing just as hard.

"I also want to say sorry for the... other stuff she said."

"You don't need to apologize. I'm used to it by now." Edward said it as he looked down, not wanting to talk about it.

"If it makes you feel better my brother's gay too.” Tank said awkwardly in an attempt to keep them talking.

"So... you have a brother?" Edward changed the topic in the most obvious way he could.

"Twin actually. He goes to an art school so you probably won't be meeting him anytime soon." As they continued to talk about family the front door opened.

 

"Hey honey I stopped by that Chinese place you like. Hope you're hungry." A tall guy walked in wearing all black with his blue nail polish being the only thing to break the pattern. He paused as he saw Tank sitting at the table right next to Edward. "Oh. What's going on?"

"O-oh hi Rodney. Uh... this is Thomas... I'm helping him with his work. Thomas this is my boyfriend Rodney." Edward introduced them and Tank waved. Rodney narrowed his eyes as he approached the table.

"Well I brought enough food for 3 if you feel like joining us." He sat the bags of food down on the table and moved some of the papers out of the way. "Besides, this guy barely even eats." He jerked his head over at Edward who has closing up his books. Tank did the same. "Man did you guys sit in here all this time? It's hot as hell." Rodney stripped off his jacket and threw it over to his bed. Tank, who'd been wearing a simple T-shirt, had noticed the room was warm but didn't think too much of it. Edward fiddled with his sweater sleeves as he felt Rodney expect him to take it off.

 

After dinner Tank walked home to his own, much smaller, dorm. The entire time he couldn't get rid of the feeling that was itching in the back of his mind. Something about the way they talked to each other rubbed him the wrong way. After Edward declined joining them in eating and moved over to his bed Rodney went on and on talking about him as if he wasn't there. "God he's so shy. The first day we met he took an hour to tell me his name and when I tried to be nice and introduce him to some people he can't even look up at them." and then when Edward went to take a shower, "Honestly, the only reason we're even together is cause I feel bad for him. I don't think he has any friends." But Tank didn't say anything. So far, he liked Edward but it wasn't enough to ruin his reputation over and possibly start a fight over some guy he barely knew. He just wanted to have a couple of good parties before he left to go back home and take whatever job he could take to fill his time.

 

The rest of the month passed in the same way with Tank and Edward meeting up, usually in the library now for a reason Edward didn't really give, and Tank slowly understanding things that were taught weeks ago. This day however was a little different. Juliet had told Tank to go to a party with her and so, of course, he did. He was having a great time and so, of course, he drank too much. At the time, it seemed like the best thing to do. He could drown out the loud voices that wouldn’t let him sleep by becoming one of them. He let himself get lost in the alcohol fueled hive mind that inhabited the room. When he woke up he was in a bed, in some room, with Juliet draped over him and his brain pounding in his skull. As he got up he noticed the alarm clock on the nightstand and saw he was late for his early Saturday appointment with Edward. He sighed and gathered up his stuff as fast as his hangover would let him before walking over to the library. It was closed for renovations or something and Eddie was getting up from the steps he was sitting on. He made eye contact with Tank and ignored him as he dusted off his pants. "Hey. Sorry I'm late." Tanks words were still a bit slurred as he didn't make the effort to even try to sound like he was fine; it didn't matter since he was sure anyone could smell whatever horrible concoction he drank last night on his breath.

"Late? Just late?" He crossed his arms, "I've been waiting for you for 3 hours!" Tank rolled his eyes.

"You didn't have to wait. You could've just cancelled through a text." Tank noticed him shift uncomfortably.

"It's not my fault. You just care more about getting drunk and fucking your girlfriend than actually making an effort for once in your life.”

"What the hell is your problem? I was having fun with friends. You should try it sometime- oh wait, you can't; you don't have any friends do you?" Tank didn't mean to say that. He really didn't mean to say that. He wished he could take it back. The poor guy didn't deserve to get the angry side of his hangover. Edward didn't fight back. He hugged his books to his chest and started to walk off like he always does only to be stopped by someone calling out to him.

"Hey! Where ya going? You gonna take it from your boyfriend again? Fucking homo!" Some still drunk frat boy shouted as he walked away. Edward held himself tighter and looked only at the ground. Tank could tell he was shaking as he walked down the steps. Was he crying? Tank spent the rest of the day trying to convince himself that Edward was just cold. He knew that was a lie. The weather was perfect enough to be summer and he was wearing his sweater.

 

Tank couldn't stop feeling bad about what he'd said and he could practically hear his mother’s voice telling him to go apologize. And so he did. He knocked on the door and waited. And waited some more. He could hear voices from the other side and before he went to knock again the door opened. Edward peeked through the door. "Can I help you?" His voice was shaky and his eyes were red and puffy. He had been crying.

"I uh... Wanted to apologize. I didn't mean to yell at you...it just sort of...came out." This was his first time seeing him without his neatly combed hair and tucked in shirt and all of it just seemed to hit him all at once making him lose the speech he had prepared on the way over. "Are you OK?"

"Yes. I'm fine." Tank could tell he was lying. Edward turned back to look behind him at something Tank couldn't see. "If you want me to keep helping you, you can meet me during my break, I start a new job tomorrow. I have to go but I'll send you the information." And with that he closed the door. Tank stood there wondering if he should knock again and try to get more out of him. Edward was obviously not fine. As he argued with himself he saw the same frat boy from earlier walk into the room next door and decided against it telling himself he didn’t want to cause a scene.

 

Tank found himself sitting in the back booth of a hideously decorated family restaurant. He looked around and each time it was as if they had decorated with the idea of having something new attack his eyes every time; it was as if they couldn't decide what theme they wanted to go with so they just did it all. He looked down at his book and attempted to read through some of the pages hoping the impenetrable wall of text would provide some sort of peace. When he looked back up Edward was walking towards him in the most embarrassing outfit anyone could come up with. The tight shorts came up to halfway above the knee with yellow suspenders holding them up that contrasted horribly with the green shirt he was wearing. To top it all off he was wearing elbow length black gloves that did not belong at all. It was like looking at a walking car accident. It was horrible yet, he couldn't look away. As Edward came closer Tank noticed how the bright colors seemed to wash out his already pale skin making him look sick. "Well that's... something."

"The uniforms are horrible but it pays well. Can we not talk about it?" Tank nodded and leaned on to the table. As Edward looked through his back pack Tank noticed the marks on his neck.

"What happened there?" Edward placed a gloved hand on his neck and went blank.

"O-oh it’s nothing. R-Rodney and I we... well we-" He struggled to make the words come out.

"It's alright I think I can piece together what happened." Tank waved the question away and Edward chuckled nervously.

"So history today right?" He flipped through page after page in the textbook and Tank knew he should be doing the same yet, for some reason, he couldn’t rip his eyes away from Edwards own.

 

"Can I ask you something?"

"Of course." The question was on the tip of his tongue and was waiting to be spilled out but this wasn't the right time besides, would he even want to answer?

"Thanksgiving break's coming up. Do you have any plans?" Tank smiled nervously.

"No... Not yet at least. I was kind of hoping I could meet Rodney's parents but I guess that's not happening." He answered though he noticed how Tank changed his composure. "Was there something else you wanted to ask me?"

"No, not at all.” He smiled again. “If you don't have any plans there's a party going on Saturday. Why don't you come? Think of it like a thank you for helping me out. Yea?"

"Uh...sure," Edward hated crowds and the thought of going to a party was a nightmare but, he liked the idea of spending more time with Tank, "I think I'd like that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been waiting to get to this chapter and I made it way too long so I had to split it up into 2 parts. The next part should be out tomorrow.


	7. Flashback #3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 2

As Edward stood in front of the frat house he immediately regretted every decision he made that led to this exact moment. To the left of him there was some girl who threw up her dinner who then continued drinking her beer like it was nothing, in the bushes in front of him there was a couple who, he was pretty sure, were having sex and all around him dozens of drunk college kids were yelling at each other over the loud music. It was a mess he'd rather not step in to but the promise of spending the night with Tank without a textbook involved was too good to pass up. He wasn't expecting much from their relationship; he was just hoping they could be friends so he didn't have to spend another Saturday night alone with books from the library. He wanted someone to talk to so he didn't have to sit in silence while the next episode slowly loaded up on his computer screen. Maybe that was a little too much to ask from a guy who had only come to play football for a couple of years and maybe leave with a degree but there was something different about him. It's entirely possible that Edward had just been watching one too many romance movies, and Rodney wasn't really much for talking, so he just decided to apply all those feelings to first person he'd had extended conversations with. Either way Edward found himself in a place which seemed to hold half the student body just so he could talk to the one person he knew. He took a deep breath and finally decided to move from the spot he'd been standing in. He walked through the door and was, once again, reminded that he really did not belong there. There were people everywhere. It would have been impossible to cross to the other side of the room so he picked a spot on the wall and leaned there hoping he could spot Tank soon, talk for a while, and then get out.

 

Half an hour passed and Edward was getting tired of having to pretend he was texting someone. During this time he had more time to think about his master plan. Since Tank hadn't even seen him, this entire thing was pointless. He could wait a little longer and hope that some God out there felt pity on him and willed Tank to come and talk to him or, and this was starting to look like the better option, he could just leave and hope no one noticed he was there and get back to his room just in time to have a good cry before Rodney came back. If he could just make it through the crowd he could reach the door and if he was fast enough he could leave and no one would even know he had been there. He sighed and wished he had something to drink hoping that some alcohol in his system would make the situation infinitely more bearable. Unfortunately, or fortunately, the stars were not aligned in his favor. As he put his phone back in his pocket in order to begin executing his escape plan, Tank, noticeably disheveled, came down the stairs in front of him with his girlfriend following close behind. Edward's heart sank. He knew Tank had a girlfriend, he knew Tank wasn't interested, he knew that even if he did like men he'd never go for someone like him but he didn't know why he was so crushed when they shared a sloppy kiss made worse by alcohol. Everything in his body was telling him to run. To just go and forget this night even happened. This was a mistake and he was an idiot for even thinking of coming here. What the hell did he expect? As he stood there Tank finally noticed him.

"Hey Eddie." He was drunk already. "How long have you been here? You need a drink come on, I'll get you one."

"N-No it's fine. I think I should go now." Edward turned to leave but was pulled back.

"C'mon have some fun for once. I'm not letting you leave sober at the very least." Tank held on to his arm with full intention to pull him through the crowd to the nearest cooler.

"I really don't drink. Plus your girlfriend's waiting for you." As they were talking, the misaligned stars struck again as the crowd pushed them together to clear the floor for some kid about to do a trick he would most definitely regret in the morning. Tank and Edward were touching foreheads and even after the crowd moved away, Tank didn't. It seemed like he was getting something out of having Edward trapped against the wall. As if he enjoyed hearing Edward's fast beating heart. Before either of them could do anything they heard a familiar voice.

"Hey Eddie. Didn’t expect to find you here." Rodney stood beside the two and it was clear from the look on his face that he was not happy with the position he found them in. Tank shuffled off of Edward as fast as the alcohol in his body would allow him, which really wasn't fast at all, as Edward started to panic.

"Wait! I can explain. Rodney please..."

"It's OK. You can explain over a cup of beer. Look at you. Can't have any fun while you're sober Ed." His words seemed to phase right through Tank and hit Edward full on making him want to step into a corner and disappear. Rodney held on to his wrist and pulled him through the crowd with such determination that the people stepped out of the way to make a path for the pair. Edward was having trouble keeping up and wished someone would step in front of them just to slow Rodney down for even a second. The stars had stopped listening to him, if they even cared in the first place. Finally Rodney had led him to a room that, for the moment, had been left alone by the other party-goers.

 

Edward kept risking glances at the door hoping someone would come in to give him an excuse to run out of the house but he wasn't even sure where he'd go. He just didn't want to be here anymore.

"So that's why you've been spending all that time with him. All that stuff about studying was just a lie." Rodney accused as soon as they were far away from the rest of the house.

"No! I promise, I never did anything with him." He begged. "Please... I just want to go home..." Edward hugged himself and looked down at his shoes. He tried his best at keeping his tears from flowing out.

"Oh, no, Eddie why don't we go back and find him so you can tell him exactly what you want. Then you two can go upstairs and fuck for the rest of the night!" Rodney shouted and stepped closer. Edward wanted to back away but he was too scared to even try. Rodney grabbed his arm again. "I said lets go Edward!" He hated the way he said his full name, he hated his full name, he hated Rodney, and he hated himself. He just wanted to not be here.

 

Tank had followed them to the other side of the room and had seen Rodney slam the door behind them. Something in him told him to go in after them, something else told him not to get involved, and the loud music mixed with the beer overpowered both. He leaned on the wall and felt the music vibrate through the wall as he looked out into the sea of people he vaguely knew. There against the wall was like his own little island where he could drift off into his thoughts. Unsurprisingly, his thoughts tended to flow towards Edward. He wasn't sure if he liked him or if he just felt bad for him. He also wasn't sure if "like" was the right word to use. They hadn't talked much outside of math or English...or history and science...and every other subject but, in the most cliché way possible, there was something about him that just made Tank want to spend more time with him. He'd been having this recurring dream lately and he wasn't sure what to make of it. In the dream he'd open a door only to find a table with papers, books, and a half empty cup of coffee making room for Edward's sleeping head resting on his arms. He walked closer and slowly move the chair back and pick him up without waking him. He would fail every time and every time Edward would wake up just in time to pull him down into the bed with him. They'd lay there and Tank swears he can feel Edward's warmth, weight, and overall presence on him and around him. The feeling surrounds him and it is the most comfortable and reassuring thing in the world. It makes him feel safe and he doesn't know why.

 

Just as he's breaking through his sea of thoughts and back into the surface of reality he notices two things. He's been staring off straight ahead of him, and the room behind him just got a lot louder. The walls were pretty thin and if you stood too close you could hear everything that went on behind them. It was all Rodney that he heard shouting. He never liked Rodney since the first time they met. Now he had a chance to do something about it. Thankfully the door was not locked and he was able to walk right in just in time to see Edward get pushed down. He avoided looking up but Tank could still see he was scared and crying. Rodney was staring at Tank with the most hate-filled eyes.

"What the hell do you want?"

"I want to know what the hell is going on in here." Tank tried to stay as calm as possible. He didn't want anyone else to hear them and walk in. Edward at least deserved that bit of privacy and he didn't want some drunk frat kid try to start a fight for fun just because he's drunk.

"Don't fucking worry about it. Why do you even care? Don't you have anything better to do? Like that cheerleader girlfriend of yours."

"Don't you have something better to do? Like not starting a fight you're gonna lose?" By this time Edward picked himself up from the ground and was standing as far away from them as the room would allow. Tank didn't remember much about how it started but he knew Rodney threw, or at least attempted, the first hit and Edward left the room some moments after. Edward tried to separate them only to be flooded out of the room by the sea of people that came in to watch them.

 

Edward walked out of the house and kept on walking. He didn't know where he was going. He didn't want to go back to his room that's for sure. He walked and turned wherever his legs took him and didn't bother looking up. He was upset and angry and he was equally as upset and angry that those feelings found a way to be directed back at him. Half of him told him that is wasn't his fault; there wasn't anything he could do. The other half told him he was worthless and he didn't even try; it's all his fault. Both sides cancelled out and left him numb and in tears. He wanted to scream but couldn't be bothered to put in the effort. His legs reached their destination and parked themselves in front of a cliff overlooking the city. He wasn't sure how he found out about this spot but since then it had become one of his favorites. He sat as close to the edge as the railing would allow. He tried not to think about anything and just enjoy the view but that wasn't something he'd ever learned to do. His mind shifted through thoughts each coming to the conclusion that: yes, someone would eventually notice he was gone and yes, it would be very painful to throw yourself down into rocks, trash, and trees down below. A car whizzed by on the road behind the trees and he realized he didn't have anywhere to sleep. Rodney would kill him so he couldn't go back to the dorm. That also meant that he couldn’t go back to the dorm and get money for a hotel room.

 

Tank won the fight and gained a bloody nose and more than a few scratches and bruises as a reward. At some point campus security had been called. They separated the pair and sent everyone home. Of course no one really listened and they all stayed to see what happened next. For once being generally well known and well liked worked out for him since most of the witnesses reported that they saw Rodney start the fight even though the only people that really saw what happened was them two and Edward who had gone off who knows where. In the end Rodney was kicked out and was told to move out of his dorm by the end of the week. Tank couldn't wait to tell Edward. He just had to find him first. After Rodney got his things Tank went over to their dorm room. He knocked and waited. No response. He waited for what felt like years trying to call him, text him, just trying to get a response that told him he was okay.

 

Edward felt his phone in his back pocket vibrate. He didn't want to look at the screen. He didn't want to look at anything or anyone. He, however, couldn't just stand there with his eyes closed to the world. He had to open them and look down into darkness surrounded by sharp rocks and tall trees. He tightened his grip on the rusty railing and took a shaky breathe in. His phone wouldn't leave him alone. He couldn't focus. He decided to give up.

 

Tank was typing out his thousandth text to Edward when he heard footsteps coming up behind him. Edward was coming up the stairs before stopping in front of Tank. Tank smiled when Edward held his face. "Look at you Thomas. You're bleeding." He quickly opened the door and pulled him in. "Just sit on the bed; I'll go get the first aid kit." Tank did as he was instructed while Edward scrambled around in the bathroom.

"Did you hear the news?"

"What news?" Edward came back with a white box with a red cross. He set it down next to Tank and got to work cleaning him up.

"Rodney got kicked out. He won't bother you anymore." Edward stopped and quickly glanced over to the, now empty, other side of the room.

"Oh." He continued with putting bandages on some cuts and cleaning the dried up blood that stained the majority of Tank's face. Tank noticed how his arms started shaking and how he couldn't make eye contact.

"Are you okay? I thought you'd be happy..." Edward shook his head and started to put the kit away.

"He's going to be so angry."

"It's not like he can get in. Don't worry about it. I'll-"

"Stay with me... please. I don't want to be alone tonight." Tank looked up at him and didn't know what to say.

"Sure, Ok" There was an awkward pause as neither of them really felt like saying anything, "Do you want to talk about it?"

"I don't want to bother you."

 

It was late in the night, or early the next morning depending on how you look at it, when they found their way into a few cans of beer in hopes of making things easier. Edward downed his own can quickly wanting to get it over with. He leaned against the bed frame and set the can next to him on the floor.

"We met on the first day and he seemed pretty nice. He introduced me to some of his friends and they all hated me and made it really clear. He asked me out and I said yes and then we started dating. There were some warnings at first when he would get mad that I would come back late from the library and stuff like that. I've never had any other boyfriend...or at least any serious one so I just assumed that was normal. It got to the point where I had to leave the study group I was part of because he believed that I was cheating on him. I think that's when he started yelling at me. He would tell me things, like, I didn't matter, that he was doing me a favor by dating him, that I would die alone if I didn't stay with him. Then, like an idiot, I started to believe him." He paused and took another drink. Tank stared at the carpet in front of them. He listened and hoped that would be enough for now. Edward continued, "At some point he started telling me that he owned me and I ended up believing him. I guess that was around the time when we started talking. He got angry of course and things got worse. He didn't want me to bring you back to the room and I had to be back at a certain time or else he'd start throwing things. He wouldn't even let me go to the pharmacy to get a refill for my medication." He took another drink, "Which is why I started cutting again. I haven't done it since my first year of high school. Only this time I didn't even try to hide it which is why I'm stuck wearing a fucking sweater when it's almost a 100 degrees outside." Edward sighed and turned toward Tank. "Do you wanna see them? You're going to anyways if you really are going to stay the night."

 

Edward stood up and took his sweater off revealing a plain gray shirt underneath. His bare arms were covered in scars. They ranged in shape and size with no pattern whatsoever as if he ran out of room but was desperate to keep going. Tank sat there in silence like he had been; he was afraid he'd say the wrong thing and he was afraid his silence was also wrong. Edward hugged himself and did the best he could to cover the worst of it. "I guess I thought that if I covered myself in marks he wouldn't want me anymore and he'd leave me alone." He said softly before he stopped talking all together.

 

They finished the case and neither of them felt like getting up. Edward had been avoiding looking at Tank for fear he'd ask about something he didn't want to talk about. Tank stared at Edward and told himself that now was his only chance. They were both drunk so, worst case, he could blame it on that.

"Hey... can I ask you something?" Edward sighed but still looked over to meet Tank's eyes.

"Sure." He wasn't interested in talking anymore but he felt like he needed to return the favor.

"How did you know... that you were gay?"

"I don't know. I guess when I was like 10... There was this boy who used to be my neighbor and I used to think he was the most amazing person even though all he ever did was climb trees. He had really pretty blonde hair but he moved away a few years later." He breezed through without giving any details. "Why do you ask?"

"I think... I think I might be gay." Tank took a deep breath in, "And I think I really like you... like a lot." Tank closed his eyes and waited for a response. He was expecting anger or confusion. He got neither of those things. Instead he got laughter. He looked over and Edward was laughing so hard he was in tears. Tank couldn't help but join him in. They ended up falling asleep on top of each other right there on the floor after their little laughing fit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that this chapter took so long but you know how school gets.


	8. Pretty Flowers

Today is Eddie's birthday. Tank has been doing everything he could to just forget about it for only a couple of minutes so he could think of something else. All of the reminders that had been set up by him in the past kept blinking at him waiting to be seen. This year wouldn't have been anything special but that didn't stop him from planning it out a year in advance. He had planned to make reservations at some fancy place for dinner after they went out and walked through museums. At the time he thought it was something Eddie would love. Now it really didn't matter.

 

He felt tired. He felt like giving up. He couldn't do either. He made a phone call and laid back down in bed, waiting. It wasn't long until she came over; she lived next door so it's not something he'd have to worry about. He answered the door and she walked in smiling. "I wasn't expecting you to call," she lied, "but I'm so glad you did." She wrapped an arm around his neck. "I was getting so lonely." She frowned a little as she tried to be playful and then she frowned for real when Tank didn't play along. He led her up to their- his bedroom. As soon as the door was closed her arms were wrapped around him.

 

They fucked. There's no other way to say. It was romantic, or sweet, or anything like it should've been. To tank it was just a means to an end. He hoped the end would be feeling something, anything. He kept staring past her at the bed sheets and the wall. She kept moaning; tank wished she would stop. They, eventually, both finished and laid next to each other. She wrapped an arm around his chest and tank couldn't tear his eyes away from the cross on the wall.

"That was amazing. What about..." She moved over to straddle him, "a round 2?" Tank tilted his head to look behind her on to the wall. He did feel something: guilt. He felt horrible. How could he do this to Eddie? "Hell-oo. Are you listening to me?"

"I think you should go?"

"What?" She blinked and drew back.

"I think you should get out of my house."

 

At least he got what he wanted. He felt horrible and disgusting which, he guessed, was better than nothing. He looked over to the clock and realized it was already 2 in the afternoon. He could have sworn it was 10 A.M. just 5 minutes ago. Either way there's only one place he has to go today. He got up and got dressed in the first thing he saw. He grabbed his keys and went out the front door. At most, he was expecting a mailman, maybe a girl scout or something of the sort, he was not expecting to bump into Eddie on the front porch.

 

Eddie smiled. He looked so happy. Tank was horrified. He looked around for 2 things. 1) Schuster, and 2) any neighbors. He, thankfully, didn't find either and pulled the synth in forcefully

"Ow!" The robot rubbed at its wrist, "that hurt." He frowned and looked up to meet Tanks eyes. Tank was angry.

"Where is he?"

"Who? Schuster? He was late for work. He just dropped me off. Are you ok? You look mad. Are you mad at me?" The synth questioned as it took a half step back. Tank clenched his teeth. He knew it was a robot, an imitation, but it hurt to think that he would he would be so rough with his Eddie.

"Do you know what day it is today?"

"Uhm... Tuesday?"

"Does it mean anything to you?"

"Not that I know of... Why?" The synth looked confused.

"No reason." Tank turned away from the robot, "I have to go somewhere. Don't let anyone see you." He walked out of the house and locked the door behind him. He would deal with it later but, for now, there's something more important he needs to do.

 

In 30 minutes he reached the cemetery after stopping at a flower shop and taking all the detours he could. He parked his car and walked to the back with his flowers in his arms. The flowers were a mix of pink and white. He knew they probably had a meaning behind them, he didn't know it, he just thought they looked pretty. He looked around and everything seemed pretty empty. He guess people had better things to do in the middle of a weekday. He finally reached what he was looking for and forced himself to kneel down. Everything felt wrong. He shouldn't have to come leave him flowers if he had just talked to him in person.

 

He placed the flowers down and arranged them neatly. There were only a couple of other flowers already from some friends or co-workers. Tanks flowers covered them all. He sat next to Eddie and placed his head on the tombstone. "Hey Eddie." His voice was soft. He knew he was talking to nothing but it's what people did on TV and maybe there was something to it. "It's been a while. I'm sorry...for a lot of things." Tank took in a deep breath. "You must be so lonely down there. I'm sorry I kept your bear; I just wanted something to remind me of you. I forgot everything reminded me of you." He swallowed down nothing, "I wish I could be with you. I'm sorry I wasn't brave enough to down with you. You were so scared to-" he stopped his sentence and wiped the tears away from his eyes. He didn't want to say it. He didn't want to be reminded but he couldn't stop thinking about it. He dug his fingers into some loose dirt as a way of getting as close as possible to holding Eddie's hand. He closed his eyes and sat in silence for a while. He could feel tears streaming down but chose to ignore them. No one bothered him, if there even was anyone else.

 

He opened his eyes once he felt more evened out. He stood up and gave a last look at the flower-covered grave before walking back to his car. He got in and stared off into nothing. He could end it now. He could turn the car on and drive straight into the tree. In the end he turned the car on and backed out of the parking space to drive back home. He got to his driveway without really paying attention to what he was doing. All the lights in the house were off. The synth must be sitting in darkness; it was a lot later than Tank had thought it would be. As he was readying himself to get out of the car, he noticed something on the floor of the passenger side. It was a flower that had fallen out of the bouquet.

 

He walked into the house and turned the lights on. He smelled something being cooked in the kitchen and the scent immediately reminded him that he hadn't eaten in a while. He rubbed his growling stomach as he walked to the synth. It smiled at him. "Glad you're back. I was starting to get worried."

"Sorry."

"It's alright." It smiled again, "you're just in time for dinner." It began to prepare a plate.

"I got you something." Tank spoke up.

"Oh?" It stopped and turned to face him. "What is it?" Tank handed him the flower. It took it in its hand gently, afraid Tank would change his mind or that it would break from its touch.

"Happy birthday...Eddie." He had trouble calling it by name even if he was the one who decided it.

"You remembered. Thank you... It's beautiful." He smiled as he looked down at the small flower. Tank could swear its eyes brightened up a bit. "I'll, I'll make sure to put it somewhere safe." Tank nodded before sitting down at the table. The synth rushed over with the recently cooked meal and sat next to him. Tank watched as it turned the flower in its hand, watching the petals spin. The pink in the center faded into a circle surrounded by white only to become a flower for a second before becoming a circle of color spinning in the opposite direction and repeating the cycle.

 

Tank went upstairs to bed after he finished eating. It was fairly early but there wasn't anything better to do other than sleep. After it finished washing the dishes the synth followed after him. It gently put the flower on top of some books on Eddie's nightstand before he began to undress for bed. "Eddie," it looked over at him instantly, "can you come here for a minute?" Tank sat on the side of the bed. The synth stood in between his knees and smiled down at him. Tank didn't connect with its gaze. He let his hands hold onto its hips before moving up to its waist and then moved over to its arms and held on to its hands for a bit. They were warm, like they belonged to a real person. He looked up and the synth appeared to have a light blush on its cheeks. It followed the movement of Tank's hands but made no attempt to stop him. Tank held on to its hips again, this time firmer, before making his way underneath the shirt. He pushed it up slightly until the synth got the hint. He helped unbuckle the belt and remove its pants. The synth continued to stare down at Tank with curious eyes and a slight blush. Tank continued his exploration of the robots body. It felt real, it felt like he hadn't just spent the majority of his day crying over his dead husband’s grave. The synths skin was pale and clear, it was smooth and soft, it was perfect. Tank looked over to its wrists and found them to be intact, no scars whatsoever. He lowered its boxers enough to find a patch of perfect pale skin where a certain, regretted, tattoo should have been. The robot was designed with these imperfections to make it perfect.

 

Tank felt that familiar guilt rise up again as he had the, now naked, synth on top of him. He kept his hands on its hips to offer support it probably didn't need. It kept its hands on Tanks chest and was determined to keep eye contact. The synth moved slowly and nervously as if he didn't like being exposed. He held back his moans and only let out soft gasps. The blush had gotten darker and he kept looking at Tank through half-lidded eyes. Everything was perfect. Tank was able to touch and feel Eddie again. Eddie was back and it was like nothing bad had ever happened. Their life was perfect and they were happy together again. Except it wasn’t really Eddie. It was a perfect imitation. Tank moved his hips to help the synth Eddie. Eddie only closed his eyes when Tank finished inside him and he followed suit.

 

Tank couldn't stop staring at his lips. There was nothing that he wanted more than to kiss him. He traced them with his thumb as Eddie held on to his hand. They were soft, like the rest of him. It was Eddie that acted first. He leaned forward and closed the gap between them. Tank closed his eyes and traced Eddie's cheeks with his thumbs. It didn't matter if it was all a lie; Tank was really good at pretending.


	9. Flashback #4

Tank laid down on the bed as he waited for Eddie to come home. They've been dating for almost a year and in that year Eddie had managed to change his mind and make Tank completely dedicated to finishing school. At the very least, it mean being able to share a room together.

 

Tank was used to Eddie coming home late and now, at the end of the year, it was pretty much routine. He was just starting to drift off to sleep when he heard the door open and then close softly. "You're home early." Tank said sarcastically as he sat up in bed.

"Sorry, I know. They made me close up tonight."

"Yea I figured." Tank watched as Eddie picked out something to change into.

"Do you still wanna go out tonight?"

"Of course. Worst case: I fall asleep staring at some trees." He walked into the bathroom to get dressed.

"About that...I was thinking that maybe, instead, we could, I don't know, go to that party?"

"I'd rather not." Was the response that came behind the door. Tank knew it was coming and he really didn't mind; he just missed being able to go out and get drunk every Saturday. Eddie came out, now in much more comfortable clothing.

"On to your little make out spot it is then." Tank said playfully as he got his car keys.

"You know, I'm starting to regret telling you about it." Eddie followed him out the door.

 

The spot Eddie had led him to was beautiful. It was isolated too which meant things were quiet and no one came up to bother them. Tank wrapped his arm around Eddie's shoulder and brought him closer. "The stars are really pretty tonight." Eddie said softly. Tank nodded in agreement. This what most of their dates consisted of. They'd come out here and look over the city below and just be with each other.

"Hey Eddie," Tank spoke up; his voice louder than anything around them, "I love you." Eddie smiled and kissed his cheek.

"I love you too."

 

The small kiss turned into a series of small kisses which, then, turned to heavy kisses and then there was touching. Tank held on to Eddies hips as he attempted to take his shirt off without stopping any of the kisses. It was too much for Eddie who pulled away from Tank. "Wait. Sorry." Tank tried to catch his breath quickly.

"It's ok." Tank looked at Eddie who was looking out the window trying to avoid eye contact.

"Do you wanna go back home?" Eddie shook his head.

"No. Sorry, I just needed a moment." He was blushing and nervous. "I was thinking maybe we could...get a hotel room, maybe some beers?"

 

After a brief stop at a gas station, they drove over to a hotel and got a room. The room was nice but scarcely decorated; there was a bed, a TV, an air conditioner, and some paintings on the walls. The bed itself was big and it didn't look uncomfortable but that wasn't what Eddie was nervous about. He'd been planning something like this for a while but he never worked up the nerves to go through with it. Tank sat on the bed as Eddie opened one of the can from the pack. He took a few sips before noticed Tank staring at him. "I-I’ve never done this before." Eddie said shyly.

"It's alright. We’ll go slow." After a pause tank added, "or we don't have to go at all. It's your choice." Eddie sat next to him on the bed.

"How do we start?"

 

It didn’t take long for the kissing and touching to start again. However, this time Eddie didn't stop him. He let Tank, being the more experienced one, do most of the work; Tank didn't mind. Soon they were both undressed and under the covers. He took the opportunity to explore Eddie's body. He was pale all over which made the blush spread much worse as he turned a light pink. Tank grabbed one of his hands and kissed it after a brief glance at his wrist. Some scars had faded, others didn't, but tank was just glad to see there weren't any new ones. Eddie was also doing his own wandering as his hand felt Tank's chest and shoulders. He blushed and giggled nervously, when tank made eye contact. "Are you sure you're ready?" Tank asked for confirmation. Eddie nodded with a slight smile.

"I trust you."

 

Tank went slow. He was afraid to hurt Eddie but Eddie either didn't notice or didn't care. Tank was surprised to find that he was just as quiet in bed as the room filled with gasps rather than moans. Eddie was having trouble figuring out what to do with his hands. He tried leaving them by his side, but that didn't feel right. Neither did holding on to the pillow or Tanks arms. Obviously Tank noticed how he would he would switch them from place to place and helped him out by placing them on his neck.

"You can keep them here. Is that better?" Eddie nodded, too lost in the moment to speak.

 

Tank continued to reassure Eddie with kisses on his neck, shoulders, and lips. In return, Eddie did the same in between moans. When they both finished, Tank helped a tired out Eddie get cleaned up. "I love you." Eddie said softly as sleep weighed down his eyelids.

"I love you too." Tank replied with a kiss on his forehead. They wrapped themselves in the blanket. Eddie couldn't help but smile every time he looked at Tank and Tank couldn't help but smile back at him. They hugged each other and it wasn't long until Eddie fell asleep in his arms. Tank didn't mind. He needed the sleep. He also really liked petting Eddie's hair. Everything was warm, he felt happy, and he felt safe. It was perfect.


	10. Junk Mail

As the early morning sun shone through the curtains Tank had a momentary flash of panic that Eddie was late for work. As he moved to wake up the figure next to him, it faded away as the synth was awake and looking up at him. It smiled and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before placing its head on his chest again. "Did you sleep well?" Tank nodded in response as he was still too tired to speak. Years of routine had taught him to wake up early and he debated if it was even worth it to go back to sleep.

 

In the end, when his neighbors began to cut their grass, he decided to stay awake. He hugged the synth and felt how warm he was. Eddie smiled and gave him more kisses, appreciating the attention. "Do you want some breakfast in bed?"

"That sounds nice."

"Alright. You just stay up." The synth got out of bed and almost immediately the cold air hit tank full on. The AC had been left on all night making it feel more like December than October.

 

The Synth came back with a tray of food. As he placed it down, he took back his spot in bed. "I hope you like it." He smiled at Tank again. There was a part of Tank that desperately wanted to pretend and believe that it was really Eddie. The other half wanted nothing more than to throw him out and forget about it. The synth was nothing but an imitation and he knew the real Eddie would be angry had he been able to see it.

 

"Aren't you cold?" The synth spoke up ad it got out of bed. "I’ll turn it off for you." He turned off the air conditioner and took away the empty tray before sitting on tanks lap. He smiled and wrapped him in a tight hug. "Gotta keep you warm; don't want you getting sick."

"So it was you keeping me warm?" The synth nodded and gave him a kiss on the cheek. His skin was warm and if he stayed like that for much longer tank would fall back asleep.

"You don't have anything to do today except maybe..." Eddie kissed his forehead, "you should take a shower."

 

With the synth gone, tank got up. The shower gave him more time for him to focus on his thoughts. At the moment, that didn't seem like a bad thing. For once he was in a good mood. He felt like going out and doing something but he wouldn't be able to take the synth. Well he could...it would just be odd to see him walking with his dead husband by his side. Maybe they could go somewhere really out of the way.

 

When tank got out of the shower the synth had picked up the mail that had fallen through the slit in the door. He smiled up at him. "Look at you, you're dripping water everywhere." The synth chuckled before going to clean it up. As he did that, tank went to the mail. Most was bills, a few letters for Eddie that he set aside to deal with later, and one from an address he didn't know. The envelope was a little folded and dirty but, otherwise, plain. The letter inside was written on regular notebook paper but the handwriting was beautiful.

 

_We need to talk._ The rest of the letter was just an apology for the cryptic message and ended with _there is more to the synth than you know._ Tank kept staring at the paper. This person knew where he lived and they knew about Eddie. Only two people knew about him and neither of them would do this. He put the letter back in the envelope and placed it in a drawer to deal with later.

 

Eddie wanted to leave the house. More specifically, he wanted to go for a walk in the park. He insisted it would be good for tank and tank knew he was right. After a whole lot of begging from the synth, tank agreed. In return, Eddie agreed to wear a scarf so people didn't see his face. Eddie couldn't stop himself from giggling the whole ride there; tank felt like he was gonna throw up from nervousness.

 

Thankfully for tank, the park was empty. The synth held his hand as they walked. Tank didn't feel like talking and the crunching of the leaves did an amazing job of filling the silence. Eddie put his head on tanks shoulder. "This is nice." He commented. Tank couldn't do more than nod. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." Tank replied quickly. Eddie stopped walking and pulled tank back toward him.

"Please, tell me."

"It's nothing. Really. I'm just...cold." Eddie knew he was lying and, either by choice or programming, he didn't say anything about it.

"Maybe we should go get some coffee to warm you up."

 

Eddie agreed to wait in the car while tank stood in line at a nearby coffee shop that was always full. The synth spent his time messing with the radio stations or the ends of his scarf. Neither held his attention for long. The only thing that did was the ringing of tanks phone. He didn't recognize the number but they seemed determined to talk to tank. When calling didn't work they switched to texts. Eddie looked at the notifications on the screen. He wanted to check what they said but of course he couldn't.

 

Before he could think about it anymore Tank came back to the car. He set the cups down. "I got you one too. I'm not sure if you can drink it...just thought you might like it." This was the first time he'd given it any thought. It just felt natural to order two.

"Thank you." Eddie picked up his cup of sugary coffee, "and, yes, I can drink, and I can eat too, I just...don’t need to." He said with a shrug before taking a sip from the cup. Tank smiled. Though, it quickly went away when he checked his phone. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Just someone I don't want to talk to right now."

 

The drive back home was silent. Tank was still focused on the texts. Justine had been trying to talk to him. She wanted to meet up again. The first time had been a mistake and he thought she understood that when he kicked her out. Now that Eddie was back, it felt even worse. He still felt guilty and he knew he deserved it.

 

While Eddie made lunch, Tank found the mysterious letter again. He should have just thrown it away and forgotten about it. In the end, he and Eddie made their way to the address on the letter. "This is a bad idea Tank. What if they hurt you?" Eddie kept asking in the passenger seat of the car.

"Don't worry too much about it Eddie. I'll be fine." He knew the synth was still worried but at least now he wasn't saying it out loud which made himself feel better. The neighborhood the letter was from wasn't bad at all. In fact, most of the houses were expensive looking. Definitely not the type of house you’d expect to find a conspiracy theorist. He parked the car and neither of them felt like getting out.

 

Finally Tank got out of the car and Eddie followed him, quickly holding his hand and giving it a squeeze. "What are you so worried about? You're a robot; it's not like anything's really gonna hurt you."

"We can still feel pain... and I don't want to lose you." The synth gave Tank something else he could think about and, after a deep breath, he walked up to the door. He knocked and waited.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way I made a Tumblr account under the same name. There's nothing on there yet but I'm thinking of adding shorter stories and stuff to it.


	11. Flashback #5

Before either of them knew it, their time at college came to an end. As a reward for all his hard work, Tank got his degree and Eddie moved on to a position in a hospital. They found it hard to say goodbye and ended up moving into a small apartment close to Eddie's new job. The apartment itself was nice, a quick glance didn't bring up anything wrong, however, it was too small. Among their furniture, Eddie's collection of books and journals, and a combination of their things, they found just enough room for both of them to squeeze by. The one bedroom with the too-small bed they had to replace made it obvious that it was meant to house only one person. Another thing they hadn't really noticed when they found the apartment was the walls. Either they were too thin or their neighbors where too loud but on some nights they could hear their upstairs neighbor, who was really an otherwise sweet old lady, arguing with other occupants about the noise. However, like the lack of space, they soon got used to it and even began to expect it.

 

For the next few years they naturally fell into a routine. Early in the morning, Eddie's alarm would ring sending him into a panic as he scrambled to get ready for the job he always arrived half an hour early to. Meanwhile, Tank would make breakfast for him to eat on the way and hopefully calm him down. Eddie would go to work and Tank would be left alone to clean or do laundry. His time spent fighting in the marines before college earned him enough money to pay his half of the rent and still have some left over so finding a job really wasn't much of an issue. Finally, when Eddie comes home, which is usually late, Tank would make dinner.

 

Every now and then, there was a break in the routine in the form of a day off for Eddie. Sometimes they'd go out on a date to a nice restaurant, a movie, or whatever Eddie felt like doing on that day. Usually, though, they would stay home and spend the day in bed doing exactly what you'd expect. Today was one of those days. Their previous activities earned them a mention in their neighbor's argument. Eddie couldn't help but laugh in embarrassment. "Am I really that loud?"

"No, but the bed is." As Tank turned to face him, the bed springs squeaked, proving his point. Eddie smiled, Tank stared at him for a second. There was no one that he loved more than Eddie. He found it hard to imagine what it would be like to be without him. "Hey Ed... can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Do you wanna get married?" They were both silent for a second before Eddie, realizing that Tank was serious, finally responded.

"I hope that's not your actual proposal... but the answer is still yes."

 

It took Tank a month to find the perfect ring. When he finally found it he didn't know how to ask. He was sure Eddie would say yes but that didn't stop him from trying to make it special. In the end they went out to get dinner and on the walk home he proposed in front of a fountain. Eddie had seen it coming but he cried anyways. Tank knelt down and looked up hopefully as Eddie smiled and his eyes lit up to the point of tears. Eddie nodded his head in response and Tank pulled him into a hug before helping him put on the ring. "It's beautiful."

"Just like you." Tank chuckled as Eddie playfully slapped his shoulder before wiping his tears away. "I love you."

"I love you too." Eddie kissed him and Tank doubted he'd ever felt happier than he had at that exact moment.

 

Their next step in starting their lives together was to find a house that had all the space they needed. Thankfully, Eddie's job paid well and they were able to move into their dream house. It was two stories with a large back yard and two bedrooms. It was more space than they actually needed or knew what to do with and it was perfect. Eddie got his own office, there was a guest room so family could come visit and it was closer to work.

 

The moving process was relatively fast due to having already gotten rid of some of their things for their old apartment. The hardest part was the wedding planning which they couldn't start until Tank visited Eddie's family in person. Eddie had introduced them to Tank years ago through a video call but he wanted to tell his family the news in person and, more importantly, he wanted to visit Germany again. Seeing how important this was to him, Tank agreed.

 

On the first day they were there, dinner was a mess. Eddie's father hadn't come back from his business trip yet and his mom did not know English. Eddie did his best to translate but it only made for awkward pauses in conversation.

 

The next day went a little better now that Eddie's dad, who spoke English, was here. Tank felt much better during breakfast now that he could talk and be understood by someone other than Eddie. However they didn’t really talk much as Tank didn't know what to say and they still had to pause so that Eddie could translate what his mom said. That afternoon Eddie's dad brought home their solution to their problem. A pair of glasses. The first time he wore them, he was left with a massive headache as he found the disconnect of what he was trying to say and what actually came out of his mouth quite disorienting.

 

Dinner was a bit easier to handle as he could follow along with the conversation. "Maybe, by the next time you come visit, you could teach him German." Eddie's mom suggested. Tank and Eddie smiled. Eddie had tried to teach him little things like how to introduce himself and ask simple questions but Tank either couldn't pronounce them or completely forgot them. Dinner went by and they moved into the living room.

 

As they sat on one of the couches, Eddie turned and whispered in his ear, "by the way, I haven't told them yet."

"Told them what?" Tank whispered back, or at least he hoped he did as the headache made it hard to think. Eddie gestured to the ring on his hand that he slipped back on sometime after dinner. "Why not?"

"I was busy translating for you-" before Eddie could continue his thought his mom came back with coffee cups followed by his father.

"What are you two whispering about?"

"I was just saying that he looks good in glasses." Eddie smiled. As his parents sat down across from them, his mom noticed the matching rings they were wearing

"Is there something you want to tell us?" Eddie nodded.

"The reason we came over is because...we're getting married."


	12. Locked Room

"I'm glad you could make it." Tank looked down at the man that answered the door. "Come in." The man poked his head out and looked around before he turned and walked into the house, leaving the door wide open for them to pass through. Tank and Eddie shared a look before Tank stepped into the house and Eddie followed. The house was just as beautiful on the inside as the outside would suggest. There were peaceful paintings on the walls, elegant vases with even more elegant flowers inside, and expensive looking furniture.

 

"Oh right, names.” The man turned to face them, “Samuel.” Tank, reluctantly, shook his hand. "And this," he gestured to the door behind them, "is Ted." On cue the synth walked into the room, tray in his hands. He looked at the group before finally settling his eyes on Eddie. The best way to describe the synth was broken. There were spots of exposed wiring and mechanical parts where the fake skin has been ripped away. There were spots on him that seemed charred. When he moved, there was an audible clicking noise from his joints. He never took his eyes off of Eddie, even as he set the tray down.

"Who are they?"

"Friends.” Samuel said quickly. "Why don't you and Eddie go outside and talk?" Samuel said, more as a command than a suggestion. Eddie reluctantly followed the bigger synth outside to the backyard as Tank looked on, worried. "Don't worry about them. We have something important to talk about." Samuel shoved the warm cup into his hand to refocus Tank on him.

 

Tank sat there for what felt like years but, in reality, was much closer to an hour. The man, Samuel, a stranger, invited him over only to talk. He talked about nothing, seemingly letting the sentences flow out of him with no topic or reason until, finally, he got to the “something important.” "I hope you don't mind but, I got your information off of your order documents."

"Order documents?" Tank perked up as the words stuck out among the sea of nonsense.

"For your synth." He took a sip from his cup before continuing with his explanation, "I work, well, worked, with the company. They had assigned me to a new project, the new line of customs, and yours was one of the first I worked on."

"And then you sent me a letter because..." Tank interrupted what he knew would be a long story. He didn't feel like staying any longer than he had to and the fact that Eddie wasn't there with him made him feel uneasy.

"I'm getting to that."

 

***

Ted clicked his way to the shed at the end of the yard and opened the door. Eddie stood there until he figured out he was supposed to follow. Ted was kneeling down rummaging through a chest while Eddie stood over him. From this angle, Eddie could see even more damage on him. More cuts and burns and even some hastily done stitches that seemed to hold most of him together. “D-does it hurt?” Eddie finally asked the question that’s been burning up inside him.

“You get used to it.” Was the only response Ted gave after a long pause in his movements.

 

He clicked back up to a standing position and handed Eddie a small shovel. “Don’t worry about it.” He walked out of the shed dragging a nearby wagon with him. It was filled with flower pots each containing flowers of every possible color. “You should hang up your jacket. We wouldn’t want it getting dirty.” Eddie nodded and did what he was told. “You can dig the holes and I’ll plant the flowers.” Eddie was too afraid to question it and, once again, did what he was told.

 

As he dug the holes, he felt Ted’s gaze pierce into him. He was suddenly aware of his exposed arms as he worked. It didn’t take long until dirt got into all of his nails and stained his hands, some even managing to get higher up on his arms. The dark specks contrasted on his pale skin making him aware of the mess on his skin but he didn’t dare stop what he was doing to brush it off. As if sensing his fear, Ted knelt down next to him. “Don’t worry he’s not gonna hurt you.” He brushed off the dirt from Eddie’s arm and let his hand linger on his skin. His hand was warm but the roughness of his fingertips robbed Eddie of any comfort he could’ve gotten from it.

 

“So he’s the one that did it to you?” His voice came out shakier than he wanted it to be and Ted obviously picked up on it.

“Yes. But let’s not talk about that.” Turned and grabbed the nearest pot. “Let’s finish up the garden and then we can get you cleaned up.” The way he said “we” unnerved Eddie. It was as if he had seen a link between the two that Eddie didn’t know about and all it did was make him wish Tank was there with him.

“Is this all you do? Plant flowers?”

“No. Sometimes I decorate the house, obviously I cook, and then anything else that needs to be done unless he… gets curious.”

 

With both of them focusing on planting the flowers it didn’t take long for them to finish. At least Eddie focused completely on planting; he knew Ted was staring at him any chance he could. “Don’t they look pretty?” Eddie nodded in agreement. “Now,” Ted stood up, causing a cacophony of clicking that burned inside Eddie’s ears, “let’s get you cleaned up.” Eddie was led into the kitchen through the back door. He awkwardly stood with his hands out in front of him, too afraid to touch anything, until Ted turned the faucet on for him. However, Ted didn’t let him wash his hands. Instead, he held on to Eddies arm and poured on soap into his palm before stepping behind him. He pushed Eddie’s hands into the warm water and cleaned them for him.

 

He was slow with it. He took his time rubbing Eddie’s hands before moving onto his arms. “Such soft skin.” Ted spoke into his ear. As Ted admired Eddie’s skin he stepped closer, trapping Eddie between him and the counter. Eddie was paralyzed. The warmth coming from Ted and the slow strokes of admiration were too much for him and he didn’t know what to do other that wish for Tank to come into the kitchen and pull him off of him. It seemed like fate wasn’t going in his favor as he heard footsteps going up the stairs and, most importantly, away from the kitchen.

***

 

He continued on with his story, seemingly adding in more details just to anger Tank. "For most synths we're told to simply make them friendly, speak a couple of languages, and maybe sometimes add in an accent. The same applies to custom synths except, with them we have a specific end result." He paused to finish his tea. "Well on this run of custom synths we didn't do any of that. Instead we were only given this small box thing to install." He stopped talking, expecting Tank to already know what he was talking about. He didn't.

"So what does that mean?"

"Well they wouldn't tell us what it was or what it did, only saying that it was an upgrade to a previous system. Anyways, the reason I reached out to you was because your synth is the only one that's been shipped out so far and I really need you to prove my findings."

"Findings?"

"Follow me."

 

Samuel got up from his seat and led tank upstairs to an office. The first thing that caught his attention was the wall that looked straight out of a movie. Red string connected various papers with notes hastily scribbled onto them. It was a lot to take in but Samuel insisted on continuing with his findings. "From what I found, the box came from the memory sector, it's not unusual to implant a couple of memories into a synth but this was more than just a few. They had put in an entire life into this synth. Do you know why they would do this?" Tank stared blankly at him, having no idea what he's talking about and, truthfully, being terrified at his sudden change in character. "It's all part of the government's plan to replace us with perfectly obedient robots." The anger in his voice grew and soon he was just yelling random pieces of information to make tank see the hidden connection that wasn't there. "You know what? I'm leaving." Tank stood up and made his way downstairs.

 

Samuel followed him down. "You don't get it that synth is your husband and it's going to kill you!"

"Eddie, we're leaving." Tank called out. Eddie, taking the opportunity to run, came quickly and followed tank out the door giving one final look to the screaming man and the indifferent synth.

"What happened?" Eddie asked quietly, still shaken by the thoughts of what could have happened.

"Don't worry about it, he's just crazy." Tank spent the ride home thinking. He didn't believe most of what he'd said but the last part stuck with him. The idea that the Eddie sitting beside him is his Eddie should've made him happy but all it did was anger him. The man he had fallen in love with was dead and there was no way anyone could simply rebuild him from bits of metal...yet there it is, sitting next to him.

 

At a red light, tank looked over at the synth and noticed the dirt on its knees. "Did you get hurt?"

"Huh? Oh! No. He took me to the backyard and made me help in with the garden." Eddie chose to keep it at that and not tell him about the sink incident, knowing it would only make him furious and nothing would come from it anyway. Tank went back to being quiet as drove. "Did he say something to you? You seem angry."

"It's nothing it’s just... How much do you remember?" Eddie didn’t know how to respond to the question. He remembered what he remembered. How much it was, was something that he couldn’t come close to putting into words. Tank knew this too and resorted to asking questions about events instead.

 

By the time they got home, Tank was furious. He had asked thousands of questions and Eddie had an answer for each. Tank was hoping to find something he wouldn't remember. To prove that the hole in its memory was a flaw. To prove it wasn't his Eddie. He blamed it all on his questions but that didn't stop his tears. Inside the house he had the perfect test. He stood in front of Eddie's office. "Open the door."

"What?"

"Open the door. If you really are Eddie you'll know where the fucking key is." His voice cracked from the pressure of yelling and trying not to cry.

"I don't think that's a good idea." Eddie said softly.

"Just open it." Tank demanded. Reluctantly, the synth went into the kitchen. It stood on a chair and reached over the cabinets until it found a small key covered in dust.

"I just want you to know that there was a reason I- he locked it."

 

Tank didn't listen. He unlocked the door and went right through. The room was a mess. There were papers all over the desk and floor. The synth passed him, maneuvering around the junk, and made his way towards the desk. "I think you might want to read this." He handed over a small black notebook with a ribbon bookmark in the last entry.


	13. Journal #1

I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you.

I'm sorry I have to leave you so soon.

I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you.

I need to say it for every time I haven't been able to and for every time I won't.

I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you.

I'm so sorry

I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you.

I love you so much.


	14. Flashback #6

Tank had spent all of last night tossing and turning in his hotel room bed in between moments of sleep. Nerves had something to do with it but the main problem was not having Eddie around. He'd gotten so used to sleeping next to him that it felt wrong to have a bed to himself. It felt empty and he felt lonely. He knew that Eddie had frequent nightmares and it just added on to his worries. What if he wasn't there to comfort him? What if Eddie hadn't been able to sleep all week? What if...? He regretted agreeing to stay away from each other for the week. One of their friends had suggested that it would be romantic having genuine reactions while they walked down the aisle together. At the time, it didn’t sound like such a hard thing but now, as the time dragged on, it was the most difficult thing he’d ever done. He missed Eddie a lot.

 

He somehow managed to fall asleep and not wake up until Dave let himself in to his room and plopped down next to him in bed. He went through his morning routine as best as he could, ignoring his shaking hands and Dave’s comments on his shaking hands. As the time to go to his own wedding came closer he started getting ready. The hardest part of putting the suit on was trying to keep the couple of bites of his breakfast down. “What if something goes wrong?”

“Like what?” Dave asked, not at all worried, from his seat on the edge of the bed.

“I don’t know. What if…” Tank rummaged through his brain trying to find something to be worried about and found nothing.

“Exactly. The only thing you gotta worry about is looking good for the pictures.” Dave smiled and grabbed his car keys off the nightstand, ready to go. “Trust me. You’re gonna be fine.”

 

Tank had let Eddie have all the control on the details of the wedding. It was the first time he had seen the garden they were having the ceremony at. It was beautiful. The whole thing looked like it was straight out of a magazine. Green grass and colorful flowers made the bright white decorations stand out. He took in a deep breath and let the fresh air fill his lungs and settle his nerves.

 

By the time Tank had arrived the majority of the guests were trickling into their seats. Some came up to him and congratulated him, others, mainly from Eddie’s side, simply said hello as they passed by. It seemed that time was passing by quickly for everyone except for Tank. Someone had led him to a seat away from the growing crowd in an attempt to settle his nerves. It did very little to help as he spent the time shaking his leg as fast as he could and attempting to clear his mind. New worries came into his mind although he knew none of them held any weight.

 

Finally, the ceremony came to a start and, after a walk down between the split crowd, Tank took his spot in front of the alter. The nearby band played while the crowd remained silent with the exception of a couple of young children. Tank felt every pair of eyes staring at him. He did his best not to seem distressed but the waiting was becoming unbearable. Just as he was about to give up, his eyes landed on Eddie who was making his way towards him. He was late but that didn’t matter. He was here and in front of Tank and it felt good to finally see him again. The week felt like years and Tank vowed never to leave Eddie alone for that long again. The crowd faded away and the only thing in the world was tank and Eddie with his mismatched, smiling, eyes.

 

With Eddie by his side time flew by. Soon he held Eddie’s hand in his own and slid on the ring. Eddie looked the happiest he has ever been and Tank would’ve done anything to keep that look on him forever. Not long after, they sealed their life with a kiss. With this one kiss Tank was giving Eddie everything in his life, promising to give all his love, and support, and Eddie was giving him the same. The crowd cheered them on, reminding Tank of their presence for the first time since Eddie took his place next to him. Everyone was happy and excited causing an overwhelmingly enthusiastic atmosphere to surround them.

 

The rest of the night passed by in a blur of smiling new faces and awkward interactions as they each took turns introducing one another to family members they hadn't seen in a while. On a surface level they just wanted to talk to the guests that took the time to come. On a much deeper level, however, there was a strange satisfaction in being able to say "this is my husband." The night was perfect, with all of Tanks worries having finally dissolved into the fresh air that surrounded them.

 

The night turned into morning and guests began to make their way home, leaving the newlywed couple to themselves. The ride home was quiet. Not because they had nothing to say to each other, but because they had too much to say. Different sentences formed in their minds and danced on the tip of their tongues but eventually went away as each knew what was going to be said. It was better to leave all words for when they were completely alone in the house that they would share from now on.

 

Once they were home, they found they had no use for words, at least not now. They found ways to communicate just how they were feeling in ways words couldn’t match. They shared countless kisses and were inseparable from each other. In the few hours before the birds began to sing, Tank scooped Eddie up in his arms and carried him upstairs to continue their declarations of love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry that this took so long but I had some other things that took up all my time and I haven't been feeling that well. Now that I have some free time I'm really happy to keep writing. Anyways, thank you so much for reading!


	15. Super Secret Plan

It had been a while since Tank read Eddie's diary entry. He couldn't read any more and ended up placing back where they had found it. The synth had asked and bothered about cleaning the office multiple times before he just went ahead and did it. Tank objected, strongly, but it persisted saying it would be for the best. Tank gave up and the synth got to work organizing. Tank spent his time watching him clean, there wasn't anything better to do and it didn't need any help anyways. Unfortunately, his attention was diverted due to his phone vibrating every couple of seconds. He didn't even have to check, he knew it was Justine. She had said something about Jake's trip being extended and that seems to have restarted her efforts to get Tank in her bed. Tank didn't think anything about it, he found it hard to focus on anything. He gave in and went next door.

 

When Tank got there, the front door was unlocked and he just let himself in. Justine was there in the living room, slightly surprised by his entrance. "I didn't think you'd be here so soon." She tried to laugh it off. Tank didn't play along.

"Might as well get it over with. Right?" He sat himself down on one of the couches as she tightened the cord around her robe. He hadn't noticed it until now, but she had just gotten out of the shower. Her hair was wet and the drops that fell from it created a puddle on the floor where she was standing. She stood there awkwardly looking for something to do, her eyes landed on a small wooden box on a nearby counter. She gave a small smile before walking over to it.

"Do you want something to drink?" She pulled out a key from the box and opened up the liquor cabinet. Tank wasted no time serving himself drink after drink.

 

***

 

Eddie looked at the bookcase and sighed. Just like every other piece of furniture in the room, it had a noticeable layer of dust all over it. Not only did it cover the shelves, but the books needed dusting too. If he wanted to clean thoroughly, he would have to take out all the books and clean those separately too. He couldn't just pull them out carelessly. Some of the bigger books were heavy, others were signed, or first editions, or held some other type of sentimental value. He had to be careful with them. The process was slower than he had liked but he cleared out the shelves without damaging any book. As he was dusting he heard footsteps and he assumed it was Tank coming back inside.

 

The footsteps came closer as he stomped up the stairs. Eddie guessed Tank was in a bad mood and decided to leave him alone. He went back to his task of cleaning the piles of book in the room with him. He began placing some back on the shelf when he heard that familiar clicking noise growing louder right behind him. “Hello Eddie.” Ted spoke softly. As Eddie spun around Ted closed the space between them and pushed him up against the bookcase. Eddie struggled against his hands as they caressed his face but it was no use; he had nowhere to go. “Don’t worry. I don’t want to hurt you.” Ted continued on with in the same soft voice directly against Eddie’s face. The open door taunted Eddie out of the corner of his eyes. He debated screaming out for help, for Tank, but, as if reading his mind, Ted stopped him. “Do you have any idea where your ‘husband’ is?” Eddie’s vision was filled with nothing but Ted’s face. He could hear the ticking and squeaking coming from his jaw every time he spoke and it echoed in his ears. He could practically feel the pain in his own mouth, making him mute. All he could do was shake his head. “He’s getting to know his neighbor a lot more…personally,” he chuckled, “Who knew money could change someone’s mind in an instant.”

 

When the echo in his head finally subsided, Eddie found the courage to speak. “M-Money?” he stuttered out.

“Finally!” Ted smiled a little too happily, “For a second there I thought you forgot how to speak.” The smile would not go off of his face. "Anyways, we paid her to keep him busy." He rushed to get it out of the way and continue with what was truly important. "I really missed you." He let Eddie go, allowing him to fully sink down to the ground as each of the shelves dug into his back.

"We?" Eddie said once he finally reached the ground.

"Well it’s not like I can earn money." He smiled, again, trying to chuckle.

 

Sensing that Eddie would not drop the subject until he was satisfied with the information, Ted told him everything he knew. Maybe it was faulty wiring or just indifference that truly made him do it, Eddie didn't know. "Do you know what your husband and her have been doing behind your back?" Eddie had an idea, he just didn't want to say it. He shook his head and began attempting to get back on his feet. "Oh Eddie." Ted said almost mockingly. He shifted in the small office and extended a hand out to Eddie "we both know a synth can never really replace real human touch." Eddie stared down the hand before, reluctantly, taking it.

 

With a strength and ease that Eddie hadn't expected, Ted lifted him off the floor and pushed him up against the desk. The fast movement left Eddie stunned as his mind tried to process what happened. "But we don't need them." Ted held on to Eddies arms, digging his fingers into exposed skin. He had access to more skin now than he had at their incident at the sink. Ted took full advantage of it. His hands were too much for Eddie to process and he was powerless to stop him. It wasn't until Ted's hands made their way to the bottom of his shirt that Eddie broke out of the trance. Ted was too intoxicated with the feeling of Eddie's smooth stomach to notice Eddie's stone gaze at the letter opener on his desk. In one fluid motion the letter opener was in his hand and then in Ted's neck. His, surprisingly still intact, emergency shut of switch activated itself and Ted slumped to the ground with a thud that shook the room.

 

There wasn't time to think about Ted or the brown liquid spilling out of him. He couldn't even think about the stain that would engulf the whole carpet. There were much more important things. That familiar car parked in his neighbor’s driveway was unmistakable. Jake was home.

 

***

 

Once both were sufficiently drunk, they made their way to the bedroom. Tank was having trouble walking straight and used Justine as support. Once they reached the room he let himself fall onto the bed. Justine stood at the foot of the bed and undid the knot, letting her robe slide off and fall to the floor. Tank smirked and motioned for her to come closer.

 

Before they could go any further, Jake walked into the room. For a moment the world seemed to stop as he froze at the door, flowers in hand, and Justine turned to look at him from her position on top of Tank. In the next moment, the flowers were on the floor and Jake was pulling Justine away from Tank. In the next moment, Jake had is hands around Tanks throat. Tank struggled as time finally seemed to catch up to him. He managed to free himself but the success was short lived as a hard thud to the back of his head cut his celebration short.

 

The last thing he saw before the world went black was Jake dropping the lamp. Eddie burst in through the door right after. Samuel was following close behind. They crowded around him and then slowly faded away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine's day!! Sorry for the delay but I hope you still enjoyed the chapter. :D


	16. Flashback #7

They had only been married for a year when it happened. Eddie still remembers everything about it no matter how hard he tried to forget. It was a Thursday. The hardest thing he had to deal with that day was paperwork. The only thing he was thinking of was coming home to Tank and spending the night doing nothing productive. The ride home was equally monotonous and, if it weren’t for the bright lights, he probably would have fallen asleep behind the wheel.

 

When he unlocked the front door he expected to find Tank slumped on the couch, possibly already asleep, with the TV on. Instead, Tank was sitting uncharacteristically upright with a letter in his hand and a look of absolute seriousness that etched itself in Eddie’s memory the moment that he laid eyes on it. Eddie closed the door slowly, unsure of what to expect. “We need to talk.” Tank’s voice was low and dripping heavy with an emotion Eddie hadn’t felt before.

“What’s wrong?” Eddie’s voice felt too soft and too wrong for the situation. Tank didn’t speak, didn’t even look at him. He just handed the letter over to Eddie. Eddie’s tired eyes skimmed it until his vision started to get blurry. The tears streamed down his face but he wouldn’t let go of the letter. He wouldn’t- _couldn’t_ \- stop re-reading the letter. Tank put a hand on his shoulder in an attempt to comfort him. Eddie wouldn’t accept it. “You can’t.” were the only two words that he could muster out and even then they came out broken, soaked in betrayal as if Tank had any say in the matter.

 

Tank was persistent and held Eddie in a hug as he kicked and screamed, and sobbed, and cried. There was nothing, other than time, that would calm him down. Tank knew it and so he held Eddie even as he slumped down to the ground in defeat. His tears had dried up and the only fight left in him was in the form of hiccups that shook his whole body and scratched at his dry throat. He was like a child and Tank couldn’t blame him.

 

As the night went on, Tank still held his grip tight and Eddie subsided into silence, leaning against Tank’s arms. “Everything’s going to be fine.” Tank finally spoke up, feeling that it was safe to do so.

“You’re not going.” Eddie’s voice was too soft and too wrong for the conviction he poured into those words as if he had any say in the matter. Tank didn’t call him out on it. They both knew it was a fake promise. There was nothing that either of them could do to stop tank from going. The war had taken a turn for the worst and they needed any help they could get to keep it from ending with them on the losing side.

 

The next day, Eddie took a day off from work. He spent the day with Tank doing nothing productive and walking around the city. It gave tank reasons to come back and Eddie memories to have. They came home and had a feast of Chinese takeout in between phone calls from family members saying their goodbyes. Then they spent the night attempting to memorize every detail in preparation for the lonely nights ahead.

 

After giving him the best night he could, Eddie woke up to an empty bed and a note in Tank’s place. “I thought it would be easier to leave this way. Don’t worry. I made it through once and I can do it again – love Thomas.” For the next few months the only thing that was keeping Eddie sane was letters. Tank wrote as often as he could and he did his best to reply as fast as he could. Even when there was a knock at the door and he opened it, hoping for the best. Two men in uniform stood on the other side. Neither of them was Tank. They didn’t have to say anything. Eddie already knew what they would say.

 

Tank was dead, and they had an offer for him. As part of a new program, they would pay for a custom synth and, in return, all Eddie had to do was fill out a couple of forms. It felt too good to be true. Besides, there was no replica in the world that would ever come close to his husband. He closed the door and sat down on the couch letting the tears stream down. He was angry. He wanted to pick up everything nearby and throw it a wall. He visualized picking up the nearby vase and watching it shatter. No matter how much he thought about it he could make himself pick it up. He imagined himself screaming until his voice left him but he couldn’t even open his mouth much less make a sound. The day passed by him. And then the next one followed. And then the week left him too. He managed to cry out all his anger towards the world and he was left feeling empty.

 

He managed to get himself up from the couch and shuffle his way into a new set of clothes. He couldn’t keep the information to himself. The car rides felt sickening. It felt wrong. There had to be a better way to do it. Each stop was worse than the other. He had to sit there, feeling nothing, as those around him cried. They didn’t understand. What he and Eddie shared was something special. He felt wrong thinking it but it was the only full thought he could form. The only person who came even close to feeling the way he did was Dave.

 

As soon as Eddie opened the door, Dave knew what he was going to say. He didn’t cry. He just sat silently with Eddie. After what felt like another week, Dave spoke up. “So when’s the funeral?”

 

The funeral came and went. It wasn’t anything special. Neither Eddie nor Dave could muster up enough emotion to do something extravagant and neither wanted to pass on the task to anyone else. When it was over Dave couldn’t even get up from the chair. Half of him had been buried and he just couldn’t function anymore. Eddie sat next to him. He had an offer that kept taunting him in the form of a business card saved neatly in a nightstand drawer.

 

When Eddie called, they didn’t give him any other details but all he cared about was having his husband back and all Dave cared about was having his brother back. So he agreed.

 

Eddie didn’t know what to expect. When the synth arrived, it just knocked on the door. If Eddie hadn’t known any better he would’ve thought it was actually tank himself. It was wearing his uniform just standing there with a welcoming smile. Eddie gave him a hug that the synth didn’t return. It just stood there with its arms at its sides and said “hello Edward, I missed you too.” It was small quirks that set Eddie off. The synth was too robotic to really be his Tank and he debated simply returning him and facing the empty house again but he doubted he was brave enough to make it through a second time and Dave needed this too.

 

Just when he thought he couldn’t handle it anymore, Monty came in. He showed up with a small cube that held everything that made tank be _Tank_. In an instant he had the tank he knew and loved. The tank that told cheesy jokes at the worst times. The tank that never forgot important dates and did his best to make them as special as possible. The Tank that lived through it all and was there to hold him when it was too cold.

 

Around the same time as Monty, Schuster showed up with his own synth. The intensity with which he loved her was inspiring to both Eddie and tank. They formed the perfect role models to what their relationship should be like. Eddie and Dave spent the next years forgetting that tank died. As far as the synth knew, he’s survived the war twice now. Surprisingly, it wasn’t as hard as Eddie thought it would be especially when you see the person that’s supposed to be dead next to you in bed, smiling.

 

It wasn’t until Eddie got the news of his disease that they told him what all the forms he had to sign actually meant. It was time to keep up his end of the deal. They gave him a convincing lie to tell the synth about his best friend Julia having a baby and not being able to keep it. He hoped he’d get to see the baby for himself but that didn’t come true as his sickness suddenly got worse. At least he had Tank to keep him company.

 

In the end he felt bad for having to leave the synth alone with memories that didn’t belong to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finished writing this at 3 AM so sorry for any spelling errors and stuff.


	17. Electric Sheep

The first thing Tank saw when he woke up was a bright white light that filled his vision. It burned his eyes but he couldn’t look away; didn’t even make an attempt to do so. For a moment he was nothing but a part of white energy. Just as everything had slipped away from him, the world faded back into view. The light turned into a dot in the form of a lightbulb swinging from the force of the fan whirling above it. “Oh. Good, you’re awake. I was starting to worry.” The voice rang in his ears. It felt like he had forgotten how to hear. His ears were new to the world and he was keenly aware of everything happening in it. He could hear the wind being pushed around above him by the fan, footsteps all around him, and breathing right beside him. If he listened closely, he swore he could hear the dust hit the ground. The voice sounded familiar but he couldn’t place it. As he scrambled through his brain, Schuster came into view, solving the mystery. “The lamp really did some damage. Really knocked some things loose.” It took a moment for Tank to remember what lamp he was talking about. His thoughts mixed and stumbled around in the emptiness of his mind until they filled every crevice, every blank spot. What he did remember was blurry at best. There was a loose sequence of events but the details were missing. Every time he went through it in his mind Eddie was there. Eddie coming into the room and finding him with her.

 

“Where am I?” Tank finally spoke. The words felt wrong in his mouth, he had forgotten how to speak too, but they seemed to please Schuster who was still hovering over him.

“You’re in my basement.” He said nonchalantly, “Eddie brought you over for emergency repairs.” The word _repairs_ echoed in his mind.

“Where’s Eddie?” Tank made an attempt to sit up, only to be stopped by his connection to wires and machines. He had expected this, it just wasn’t the machines he thought they would be. Instead of an IV or heart monitor, he was connected to a computer. Repairs. He was here for repairs.

“He’s upstairs. I’ll go get him. He should be the one to explain.” Schuster left Tank alone with his shifting thoughts and noisy machines. He laid there, letting the world assault his new ears, thinking nothing and everything. Thinking about Eddie and the light. The lamp, the darkness, repairs, and Eddie. The installation complete frozen onto the computer screen beside him. Eddie.

 

All he wanted to do was to pull all the wires out and run. Run away from his blurry memories. Run away from all the memories flooding his already over-filled mind. Run away from all the memories he wasn’t sure were his. Run away from being shot and killed. Run away from being shot and coming home. All he wanted was to run away from too many memories of Eddie crying because of him. The door opened and familiar quick little steps echoed throughout the room as he walked down the stairs. Just seeing Eddie calmed him down and made all his worries disappear. Eddie stood nervously for a second before embracing Tank in an awkward hug. His position on the table wasn’t the best to return the hug but he did his best to wrap his too heavy arms around him. Eddie didn’t seem to mind.

 

“I’m sorry.” Tank spoke up. Eddie didn’t move, he just squeezed him tighter. “I shouldn’t have gone to see Justine.” Eddie shuffled off of him and held his hand.

“It’s alright.” Eddie wiped the tears from his eyes. “I’ve forgiven you.” In the time Tank had spent disconnected from the world, Eddie had come to terms with the affair. He understood the desperate need for touch. He forgave his momentary weakness.

“How long has it been?” Tank asked after some silence.

“A couple of weeks.” Eddie rubbed small circles into Tank’s hand, “Monty needed to get some… new parts.” He hesitated. It was a conversation they had to have even if they didn’t want to.

 

Eddie tried his best to explain why _he_ did it. No matter how he explained it, it all felt so selfish. Tank understood to an extent, since he did it too. Near the end of Eddie’s apologies, Monty came in. “so he’s finally awake. You know, you cost us a lot of money. These don’t come cheap.” He placed a dented black cube in Tank’s hand. It was odd to hold an entire life time in the palm of his hand. Everything that separated him from a standard mail carrier was in the cube but more importantly it held all of Thomas. Eddie took the cube in his hand. He covered it out of their sight before Tank could think too much about it.

“What now?” Tank asked the question on all of their minds.

“Well,” Monty took a second to think things through. “Your baby is almost here, we just have to go get her.”

“Her? So it’s a girl then?” Eddie couldn’t stop the smile from appearing on his lips. It was contagious. Tank welcomed a piece of happy news for once.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoy this new chapter. There is only 2 more chapters until the end of this story and I'll hopefully have them up soon! :)  
> (This is my 3rd time trying to post this so I hope everything is right :P)


	18. Flashback #8

It was odd that Eddie took any time off after the incident. Most days, he attempted to avoid being at home for as long as he could. Today, he didn’t have much of a choice. He was worn out from a string of sleepless nights and it was better to deal with it rather than let it affect his work. He decided to spend it taking short naps on the couch with some music keeping him company. The android was more than ready to serve Eddie anything he wanted. “I can do much more than cooking.” It had suggested more than once. Eddie denied each time. Almost a month had passed since Monty had come with the black box that he promised would solve all his problems yet nothing had changed. It continued to act like a servant rather than his husband. He was disappointed to say the least.

 

It came over to clean the coffee table between Eddie and the TV. “I’m sorry to bother you.” It smiled at him. “Lunch should be ready soon.” Eddie just nodded and watched him work. It carefully picked up the vase in one hand and wiped down the surface before setting it back down. It picked up empty cans which Eddie hadn’t even realized had piled up.

“Hey Thomas,” Eddie spoke up, “Come sit next to me.”

“Alright.” It had thrown away the trash and joined Eddie on the couch.

 

It smile at Eddie. “Is there something else you’d like me to do?”

“No. Just sit next to me.” It continued to stare at him with that fake smile stuck on his face. Eddie kept his eyes on the black screen of the TV.

“Alright Edward.” They spent a couple of seconds in silence letting the music speak for them instead.

“It’s a nice song.” Eddie was the first to break the silence.

“Yes it is.” It agreed mechanically.

“Would you like to dance?”

“If that’s what you want.” Eddie stood up and held his hand out. The synth took it without hesitating. Still smiling, it stood still as Edward swayed to a beat much slower than the music that was playing. He rested his head on its shoulder. The last time he held Tank like this was on their wedding day. He hadn’t even realized he started crying.

 

The synth shifted and wrapped his arms around him. It began to sway in time with Eddie. “What’s wrong Eddie?” Eddie looked up to meet its eyes. The smile was gone, replaced by a look of genuine concerned. The tears rolled down his face. Tank, his Tank, wiped them away and kissed his forehead. “It’s alright. I’m here now.”


	19. Heidi

Tank sat still in the airplane. His eyes were locked outside the window. They passed miniature fields and houses partially obscured by clouds. The clouds were pretty. They lazily sat against the blue of the sky. For a brief moment he thought that it would be nice to be a cloud. To have no purpose in life other than float along absent mindedly. Eddie stirred awake and took his head away from Tank’s shoulder. It’s hard to imagine that such things were man made. Eddie had always fallen asleep during long trips. The gentle movement was enough to lull him to sleep. Tank refused to believe that someone took the time to implement such a human quirk into a machine. It all made him question himself. Why did he need to breathe or sleep? He’s not human. Not anymore at least.

 

“Are we almost there?” Eddie asked. His voice was soft and laced with sleep, his hair was messed up, he looked perfect. He looked human. He looked real.

“Almost.” Tank smiled as Eddie rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He folded the blanket back up in his lap.

“How long have I been asleep?” He continued to stretch and yawn as much as the space would allow.

“Since the plane took off.” Monty, who had been sitting in the aisle seat spoke up without looking away from his work. It was necessary that he come with them. Only he had the proper requirements to bypass certain security measures. More importantly, he could get them out of the airport without too many people seeing them. It was essential that the project not be revealed until everything was done and ready. If that meant they had to be monitored by security all day, then they would be monitored all day.

 

The plane finally landed before Eddie could fall asleep again. The group was separated from the rest of the passengers and led through vacant hallways and secret doors by a man wearing a black suit. They were led to a taxi waiting for them in an empty section of the parking lot who then took them to a hospital. Inside the hospital they were led to a room that the nurses seemed to avoid. It was on the second floor at the end of the hallway. At this point Tank was exhausted. All he wanted to do was sleep. Eddie continued to offer his shoulder as a pillow. He seemed too calm for all the sneaking around that they were doing. But he was a surgeon. It makes sense that they would choose to carry that trait over into his robotic counterpart.

 

They sat in the room with only an empty bed separating them from Monty who was leaning against a window assuring someone of their safe arrival. A doctor came in and he hung up. She was visibly nervous most likely due to the men standing guard outside the door. Behind her a nurse was pushing in a cart. Eddie sat up in his seat showing his nervousness for once. It wasn’t until a small cry came from the cart that Tank finally realized what he was looking at. “Is that her?” He asked quietly.

“Yes. Would you like to hold her?” As soon as the words left her mouth, Eddie stood up and went over to the cart. The nurse helped in taking her out and putting her in Eddie’s arms.

“She’s so tiny.” He smiled sown at the bundle in his arms. Tears were already swelling up in the corner of his eyes.

 

Tank agreed. She was Tiny. He could almost fit her all in the palm of his hand. She looked up at him with her big round eyes and Tank could feel his heart melting. Eddie couldn’t stop smiling. “I love her so much.” Was all he could say. Tank smiled. He smiled so much that it hurt.

“When can we take her home?”

“Today. There’s just some paperwork that needs to be filled out first.” Monty followed the doctor out the door. Tank and Eddie were left alone for the first time since the beginning of the trip. Eddie didn’t want to share her with anyone. She was his and he would protect her from anything.

“Did you come up with a name yet?” Tank couldn’t resist brushing the short strands of her hair. She was beautiful and curious and happy. They hadn’t formed much of an impression on her yet, but she kept staring at them with her mismatched eyes and happy face.

“Yes actually.” Eddie couldn’t look away from her, “Heidi.”

“That’s a beautiful name.” Eddie had been significantly better prepared for the occasion and dug around in his bag for something to dress Heidi in. He picked something pink that would match the pale skin she had inherited form the real version of him. She got dressed easily enough. She trusted Eddie and let him maneuver her arms and legs into the onesie. By the time Monty came back, they were ready to go.

 

When the plane back home landed, both Tank and his baby were exhausted. He had never been more thankful that his arms couldn’t get tired. He spent the entire trip holding the baby as Eddie slept. This time, Monty was not with them. He had taken the trip ahead of them. The secret passages and empty hallways remained along with a few men in black suits and shades surrounding them from a distance. It was odd but neither, Tank nor Eddie, did anything. Their big plan was to ignore it until they could be back in their home.

 

Unfortunately, extra security couldn’t stop what happened next. Even before they reached the doors to go outside, they could see the flashing cameras. A decent sized crowd of reporters and photographers surrounded the exit which attracted even more curious people. The new family was confused until they realized all the commotion was for them. As they stepped outside, the reporters surrounded them and asked questions neither of them could understand among all the confusion. The noise was enough to make Heidi cry. The security that had been at a distance suddenly appeared right beside them. They did their best to clear a path to the nearby car waiting for the family.

 

After what felt like years of attempting to navigate the crowd, they finally reached the safety of the car. They hysteria continued on outside, thankfully muffled by the windows to a much more manageable volume. “It’s alright my little tomato.” Eddie cooed, strapping the baby into her car seat. “You’re gonna be alright.” He stroked her tiny cheek and wiped away the tears. Heidi had gotten at least 20 shades redder from the force of the cry alone. It was worrying to think what that might mean for their nights from now on.

 

No one followed them home. Except for the security. They reached the house. Everything was quiet and the car ride had managed to get Heidi back to sleep. All they wanted was to be back in the privacy of their own house and celebrate the new addition to their family by assembling the crib they had bought only a couple of hours before the trip. “I hope the crowd wasn’t too much of a hassle.” That dream was crushed as Monty was already waiting for them inside the house. “Then again you should get used to it. It’s going to be happening for a while.” Eddie sat down on the couch, placing the sleeping baby still in the car seat on the floor next to him. Monty continued. “The people had to know at some point. I had to tell the world about our little project.” He motioned to Heidi. “Don’t worry too much about it. People will forget. Just give it a few weeks.” Before he left, he handed Eddie a packet of instructions on how to report Heidi’s growth and development.

 

Just like he said, the next few weeks were filled with news about the robotic family. The higher ups of the project continued to stress the how the eventual expansion of the project would benefit children in orphanages around the world. There were people who supported it saying it would truly help the children, others were against it. They argued that no robot, no matter how advanced, could love a child as much as a real person could. Others argued that the replacement of two real people with robotic impersonators was unethical. Then all of it just went away.

 

Tank and Eddie continued to give updates on Heidi. They tended to make them vague, not wanting to give up personal information easily. Heidi was a very happy child who grew into a happy girl, and then a happy woman. The project was declared a success and new synth parents started popping up around the nation and then the world. Neither Tank nor Eddie really cared. They had each other and their children which was all that really mattered in the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the first long fic that I've ever actually finished so I'm not that good at endings but I hope you still enjoy it. :) I have some other stuff I'm working on but it's gonna take a while since I have some testing coming soon. Thank you so much for reading! :)

**Author's Note:**

> I'm planning that this will have quite a few chapters and I just wanna warn that I'm the worst at updating stories so I apologize in advance for that.


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